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Re: So different...

Posted by Nathan_Arizona on July 27, 2007, at 6:52:08

In reply to So different..., posted by twinleaf on July 27, 2007, at 1:25:44

Implicit relational knowing?

I didn't really even know it had a name, but I would have to agree that it works- at least based on my experience with my therapist.

In fact, last summer I experienced real love for the first time and even posted here that it was because I loved my therapist first. My relationships since then have been amazingly fulfilling and stable.

Another thing I think this kind of therapy helped me with was conflict resolution in the context of a relationship.

Prior to therapy, I simply couldn't tolerate any kind of conflict and would simply BOLT at the slightest sign of danger (perceived or real) in any relationship. It was a major defense mechanism on my part.

However, my relationship with my T was absolutely riddled with danger, but his consistency and patience really helped me to stay the course. If something came up, I learned that rational adults can deal with it and still maintain the relationship and love. There was no need to bolt.

It helped me to learn to tolerate hurt - which is inevitable in any relationship - because we had to deal with some pretty intense "transference" feelings,(which maybe more intense in this kind of therapy?)

Okay, now I'm just rambling.

So yeah - I know what you're talking about and yeah I do think it is an amazingly good thing.

Natie


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poster:Nathan_Arizona thread:772286
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070726/msgs/772295.html