Posted by muffled on January 11, 2007, at 21:42:35
In reply to Re: after first appt of the year i feel like im dy » muffled, posted by Scentedgarden on January 11, 2007, at 18:20:06
> i remebered 3 now...
>
> 3) what i learn from her is so with me yes...
>
> im hurting so much i cant talk right now..
>
> this is the hardest i dont want to see her again...i dont deserve her.. im nothing compared to her..she helps epeople and all i am is a pain in the neck.. she has a lovely life and im alone..she deerves a good life...but im a nobody with nothing to offer anyone...sometimes like today and yesterday i just want to ....i cant write it here but its probably obvious ...i dont want to be here, because im not a nice person...**So so sorry :( that your hurting SG.
I haven't had to terminate yet after bonding with a T, I can't imagine, well, I don't even want to think about it to be honest.....but, it must be very, very hard. It comes to my mind, that even though T is not dead, that it must be a grieving process to go thru. Hard, hard, hard.
But people do it. Somehow. They grieve, and somehow over time things ease up.... I don't honestly know much bout it. There is a grief board, but I don't think there's much that might be helpful there?
I understand what your referring to.
You are in alot of pain and feeling desprate. But DO know, that this does pass. The despratness. The pain takes awhile from what I gather, but it eases too.
Its not the end of the world, even though it must feel like it. But its not.
There is joy and happiness ahead for you. You just can't see it yet, but its there.
>
> im selfish and horrible ,a nd i take from her..and im not ever going to be as good and kind as her...and i hurt now and i dont know...im in aplce i dont know...please anyone pray for me...if you pray pray for me...thank you**I kinda not the best person for praying right now. I kinda having God isssues....but I will try and humble myself and pray for you. I dunno if He would listen to me, but I will try for you.
I'm not sure where all this untrue negative stuff you are saying about yourself is comming from. If it were myself, I would say I was lashing out in my anger and pain. And when I lash out, I tend to lash out at myself. But I expect you know, that these things that you are saying about yourself are untrue.
>
> and thank you muffled ....**thank you too SG.
I don't know the reason that you are terminating? But please give your T a chance to try and help you terminate comfortably as possible. To help you understand the process you are going thru. Its proly helpful for her too.
Don't forget, that if you feel you need more T, then you can either go back (hmmmmm, mebbe not such a good idea given the intensity???), or go to a new T????
There are some threads bout termination. Can't recall all what was said, but there was stuff where T and client exchanged small gifts to remmeber each other. Some seemed to gradually terminate with longer times btwn sessions, some T's seemed to allow limited e-mail or possibly phone contact, etc.
My thots and prayers(such as they are) are with you SG.
Take care,
Muffled
poster:muffled
thread:720991
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070103/msgs/721514.html