Posted by youngaddict on January 6, 2007, at 11:10:15
In reply to Re: freaking out.. therapist story--long..trigger » youngaddict, posted by sunnydays on January 5, 2007, at 21:44:40
> **** Wow. Well, you know what kind of a person she is based on her interactions with you. You know what kinds of clothes she wears to work, how she chooses to decorate her office, how she wears her hair, how she talks, how she arranges her body. Those kinds of things can tell you a lot more about a person than knowing if she has kids or where her house is or where she went on her last vacation.
****TRUE I KNOW. I JUST WISH THAT SHE WOULD UTTER SOMETHING OTHER THAN , "AND HOW IS **** DOING TODAY" HAHA.Until my T and I had been seeing each other for a few months I didn't know anything about him either. He's pretty loose with telling me little things, like that he has kids or telling me a story about his kids or his life if he thinks it's relevant to my therapy, but he doesn't do it often, and I don't find it necessary. And yes, I'm still obsessed with him. I sometimes think I live for those little hints he drops in sessions. But that's perfectly normal, as is Googling a T, I think, as long as you don't call her house or things like that. I'm thinking a "What About Bob?" moment, if you've seen that movie.
**** I HAVE SEEN THAT MOVIE. HAHA. I FORGOT ABOUT IT, I SHOULD RENT IT AGAIN. I HAVE DRIVEN BY HER HOUSE SEVERAL TIMES. I HAVE TRIED TO CALL HER HOUSE BUT SHE DOESNS'T TAKE BLOCKED NUMBERS, WHICH IS GOOD.
Being curious is perfectly normal, although it certainly doesn't mean she has to tell you more if she has strict boundaries. And that can be good too if someone's never had strict boundaries before, to see them modeled. It helps me sometimes (he goes through times when he says very little about himself, and it does help because he does it when I really need it).
> **** Yeah, it's very unfortunate T's aren't mindreaders. It sounds like yours is mostly good though. Try to bring up the things that bother you - it always helps so much with my T because he tries to fix it. It's really really hard to do, but it can help so much. Most of the time he thought nothing of what he did and didn't see how much it bothered or affected me, or he doesn't realize he isn't picking up on something. If they knew to do something better they would! Unfortunately, we sometimes have to help them. But I know how deeply hard it can be to bring it up.*****YEAH ITS SO HARD TO BRING STUFF UP.. OR IF I MENTION SOMETHING SHE WANTS TO DWELL ON THAT, WHEN I RALLY MENIONTED IT IN BUILDING MYSELF UP TO TRYING TO GET AT THINGS THAT ARE REALLY TOUGH. SOMETIMES ITS NOT UNTIL FIVE MINUTS BEFORE THE SESSIONS OVER THAT I AM READY TO REALY TALK AND THEN I DON'T HAVE TIME. I SIT IN QUIETNESS A LOT, BECAUSE I CAN'T BRING MYSELF TO TALK.
> >
> **** It happens some time. It might not mean she gave away your spot, she might be taking the day or that time off and not want to tell you. My T tends to forget things like calling me very easily too. I know it's hard, but try not to take it personally. Their scheduling can be very tricky. But it is hard and I hope she remembers. And going from three to one will be hard, but she seems to think you are strong enough to do it. Who knows? Maybe it will turn out to be an experience that brings something up you never expected. Those can be good therapy moments, but they can also be hard.***I FEEL ABANDONED. I CALLED HER YESTERDAY AND ASKED FOR AN EARLIER IN THE WEEK AND TO LET ME KNOW IF ANYONE CANCELED, I WAS DEVASTATED WHEN SHE DIDN'T CALLME BACK RIGHT AWAY. SHE STILL HASN'T CALLED ME BACK. BUT I DEFINITLY FEEL ABANDONED, LIKE I AM HAVE DONE SOMETHING WRONG.
> **** Well, my T has forgotten me, and it didn't mean he didn't care, it just meant he can be a little disorganized and truly forgot. Try not to take it personally, although I know it's hard.***I KNOW I KNOW! I AM REALLY ATTACHED TO HER BECAUSE I FEEL SHE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO CARES AND WHEN I HAVE SAID TO HER BEFORE THAT I AM LONELY AND HAVE NO ONE SHE SAID I HAD HER AND THAT OF THE TWO OF US INTHE ROOM SHE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO CARED WHAT HAPPENED TO ME (THIS WAS BASED ON SOMETHING WE WERE TALKING ABOUT, I WAS BEING SELF-DESTRUCTIVE)
>
THANKS SUNNYDAYS, I NEEDED SOME REASSURANCE AND SOME ADVICE AND I HAVE NO WHERE ELSE TO GO BUT THIS MESSAGE BOARD.
poster:youngaddict
thread:719662
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070103/msgs/719818.html