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Re: T's and hugging » kerria

Posted by frida on October 1, 2006, at 2:30:33

In reply to Re: T's and hugging » sunnydays, posted by kerria on October 1, 2006, at 1:36:17

For me ..a hug breaks through my wall and defenses and allows me to let go... but I can't ask my T because I fear so much being rejected.
She held me a few times in 6 years...
In those times it was her who reached out...it was always in very difficult sessions in which I made some kind of progress..or when I could allow myself to cry. Now it's been a while since she last did that, some months, and I miss that so much. Sometimes just having her rub my arm when I'm at the door about to leave, brings me tears.
The times she did hug me, were so so healing to me. One day I was crying (one of the few times I've cried in T) and she came over and stroke my hair and then held me. I cried with all of me as never before and never again.
She does sometimes reach out a little more after my session, she sometimes touches my arm or back and that means a lot to me.
It's scary for me to ask because I am afraid of being rejected...this way I know she might hug me if she considers it right...and I can hope...that someday she'll hug me again...it's painful though, to have this need.

Frida


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