Posted by Jost on September 2, 2006, at 22:16:07
In reply to I'm so sorry Racer- » Racer, posted by llrrrpp on September 2, 2006, at 21:20:53
I'm sorry it feels so bad, Racer.
It's very hard to be the one who needs to get fixed, so she can be "enough" for people for whom no one, and nothing, ever will be.
But you already are enough-- yourself--even if you can't feel it, and recognize it as the central you, rather than the you that you're living without really quite being aware of it.
Even if you can't yet take full possession of it.
I wish you could. I believe you will, in time.
Today, or this week, or this month may not be the time, but I (and I'm sure Lurspie also) and so many other people, here and in your RL--know how special you are-- -- which shines through.
Be sad, or even despairing, if you feel those feelings, but know that even those feelings are okay, are part of you, too--but never all or most of you. You really are okay, whether you feel okay, or awful; whether you've gotten 100% on a test, or have gone to a PT appointment (or cancelled it)- it matters tremendously in one sense, and none of it is who you are, which transcends all of that, in another--
Who you are may seem unstable and faltering, but it isn't. It's resilient, and at the core, you'll find yourself. We have to have faith for one another sometimes and I --and more importantly, I'm sure, many others-- have that, for you.
Jost
poster:Jost
thread:681737
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060826/msgs/682502.html