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Re: As could be expected. Dinah

Posted by gardenergirl on June 18, 2006, at 15:01:01

In reply to Re: As could be expected. Frida, posted by Dinah on June 18, 2006, at 13:42:51

> Well, in his defense, I was pretty cold and matter of fact when I talked to him. It was the only way I could be sure of keeping control. He was matching my tone, I guess.

That's not the way it's supposed to be. You can be any way that you are, but the T is supposed to be compassionate and gentle with your feelings. NOT defensive about them.

I'm not saying that T's have to be perfectly in control of their responses at all times. That's too much to ask. But most of the time. Because T's DO hear things that in another setting might make them feel hurt, angry, defensive, criticized, etc. If a T cannot handle that, then they are not prepared to do therapy.

But that conversation should have been all about your feelings about the issue and what it means to you. And it's not a stretch to feel compassion for your hurt and anger. Certainly someone who's known you for that long ought to be able to feel and express that.

I'm glad you kept the appt. and expressed yourself about it. I hope that in the coming weeks you find support and caring from many places. You'll find it here, I'm sure, and I'll try to keep my reactions about your T in check.
((((Dinah))))

gg

 

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poster:gardenergirl thread:657367
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/658379.html