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Re: One kind of funny thing » Daisym

Posted by All Done on March 26, 2006, at 14:08:33

In reply to Re: One kind of funny thing, posted by Daisym on March 24, 2006, at 23:44:28

> And your younger self needs a lot of contact to make sure that the abandonment she felt before (and caused, right? Isn't there some magical thinking of children that assumes they are the reason bad things happen?) doesn't happen again.

This is exactly how I feel. I haven't cried in session in a very long time, but yesterday, I told my T that I think I want too much. As soon as I said it, the tears came. I really feel like I'm asking for too much and it must be what pushed or pushes people (my parents? schoolmates?) away from me.

So far, though, I don't think I've pushed him too far. In fact, he wants to see me more often and he said it's okay to call. It feels good, but very, very scary to me. I wonder how much I'm going to let myself push and ask for things. I've already asked for way more than I ever thought I should or would. But, exactly what I was afraid of is happening. Once I start asking, I wonder if I'll be able to stop. I told him I'm afraid of that, but he didn't seem concerned.

I don't know. I feel like a ball of screwed up emotions right now.

Thanks, Daisy. Thank you for understanding.

Laurie


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poster:All Done thread:624149
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