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Re: T avoided my ? about attachment

Posted by pegasus on February 15, 2006, at 9:11:41

In reply to T avoided my ? about attachment, posted by fairywings on February 15, 2006, at 0:10:59

Hi fairywings,

It's really really hard to take a big risk in therapy and then have your T not get it, or not respond in a helpful way. I know it feels like a big betrayal. I've been there too, and it *hurts*. I'm sorry you're having to go through that now.

It sounds like what you're experiencing now is a pattern in your life. Whenever you trust someone, they let you down.

In your message, it was clear that your T didn't respond in a helpful way. I'm curious what did he say. Can you tell him that it wasn't helpful, and that you needed something different from him?

Also, do you know exactly what would have been a perfect thing for him to say? Sometimes I find that working through that question for myself helps me communicate better the next time, which can help bring about a more satisfying resolution.

I hope your next appointment goes well. It sounds like you've started to trust your T a little, which must mean that he does some things right sometimes. But your statement about "why are you a T if this is the best you can do" sounded really poigniant to me.

peg

 

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poster:pegasus thread:609658
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060211/msgs/609776.html