Posted by Dinah on December 30, 2005, at 15:48:35
In reply to Is my hurt causing me to think too negatively?, posted by happyflower on December 30, 2005, at 15:12:02
I get the feeling myself sometimes, after my therapist has done things that make me feel special, then returns to treating me as just one of his clients. Even when I knew that the feeling special wasn't particularly good for me.
It's happened to me with teachers too. I often had "special" relationships with teachers that I enjoyed very much, but that would occasionally earn me a sharp pinch of hurt when they treated me like just another student. As they inevitably did from time to time, no matter how much they enjoyed me at other times.
The boundary bendings feel so good, but it hurts so much when they're put back in place, and we realize who we really are to them. Yeah, they like us. Yeah, they care about us and they want the best for us. Yeah, they might even find us amusing or charming.
But in the end, we're not to them what they are to us. And reminders of that hurt. A lot.
You felt like he was your soul mate. And he did something that soul mates "shouldn't" do. (Though in reality of course they do.)
When it happens to me, I not only am hurt by it, but I hold it tightly to me to protect against hurt next time. I don't know if that's good or bad.
poster:Dinah
thread:592770
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051229/msgs/593498.html