Posted by orchid on December 20, 2005, at 20:48:35
In reply to I want therapy so much (*****trigger*****), posted by Tamar on December 19, 2005, at 16:31:18
I didn't read the full followups on this, just here and there, so maybe some one posted the same ideas before also.
What steps are you taking regarding your depression? I know you are in sexual therapy, but that won't aim at your depression that much. And I read about your GP and Prozac. Is that helping?
I think it is better to treat depression when it is early on rather than wait till it gets late. I think perhaps you can stop your sexual therapy for a while and continue your personal therapy (either from your old T or from a new T).
Also repeated episodes of depression puts a person at a higher risk to long term depression (from what I have read). So it would be a good idea to tackle that early on and not let it grow to be a fullblown depression.
And I think your husband probably meant to be supprotive since you said he has been that way in the past.
Regarding not being a superwoman, sometimes, I have that problem too wiht my rheumatoid arthritis. But remember that life is not about being a superwoman or anything for that matter. It is what you *can do* and what feels comfortable *for you* at any given point of time, irrespective of what you used to be in the past.
> Maybe it’s the time of year… maybe it’s me. Maybe I was wrong to try to sort things out with my husband, because allowing myself to be vulnerable just gives him power to hurt me. I've been on Prozac nearly four weeks now, and I'm wishing I could see someone to talk about all this stuff.
> I’ve been trying so hard to accept my limitations. I’m not superhuman; I’m diabetic and depressed and I can’t be macho and extremely active any more. I have no energy. My husband wants everything to carry on as normal. I told him I can’t, I just can’t. I have to start living life according to what’s realistic for me; pacing myself, making sure I have the energy for the things I decide to do.
> He said (with his lip curled), “And I thought you were a fighter.”
> And now I just want to give up and die.