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The thing is it is not really about the child » happyflower

Posted by orchid on December 12, 2005, at 20:40:04

In reply to I look into my childs eyes and I can't understand, posted by happyflower on December 11, 2005, at 19:16:11

> how anyone could ever hurt a child. They are so innocent and little. What is wrong with this world? We are more worried about Iraq, when we have just as much torture and abuse in the US.
> It is a sick sick sick world.

People just want to take out their suffering on anyone they could lay hands on. So children become the easy targets because they cannot fight back.

But some of the abusers turn around in their life, and feel sorry for what they have done.

I know one of my uncle who was really horrible to his kids when he was younger. He even threatened to disrobe one of his grown up daughters and throw her to the street. He was an exceptionally cruel man in my family. But now, he is starting to repent all of it. And he is turning out to be a decent fellow.

The thing is, he was that way, because his father was exceptionally cruel to him throughout his life. And he didn't have enough mental resources or the help of a psychologist or internet or books to learn otherwise. The only way he knew to take out the suffering from himself was to inflict it on another human being.

I used to think he was one of the most evil persons I have ever met, but now, I think he is just very unfortunate to not have learnt better of the world.

That is why the abuse doesn't have anything to do with the child, because if that child was not available, then some other poor form would have taken that abuse anyway. It is the abuser's fault or rather their own shortcoming.


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