Posted by allisonross on December 8, 2005, at 4:09:29
In reply to Re: The Green Light and my T, posted by daisym on December 8, 2005, at 0:54:53
> Hey, Daisy, sweetie: Thanks for what you said.
Sometimes these kinds of threads make me jealous that I can't "lighten up" around my therapy and my feelings for my therapist. It feels so complicated and important and fragile to me.
I know that only too well.
>
> Other times, depending on my mood, I find this kind of joking offensive -- like someone else said, disrespectful of the therapist as a person or insensitive to someone who may have been hurt by a boundary crossing. This response is rare for me but has happened. (I'm not criticizing, it is MY issue, not the writers.)
>
> Mostly, like all things here on Babble, I think we learn to read and/or respond to certain threads and to avoid others.I agree. That is what I stated. if someone says something I don't understand, or agree with, I remain silent. THe last thing anyone needs, is criticism.
Whether it is the subject line or a specific poster. And it isn't about agreeing or disagreeing with content, it is about protecting yourself --
I was upset; didn't think talking about flirting or buying a green lightbulb would elicit such a response.
sometimes a poster's struggle is too close to home and calls up too much pain for some of us to respond to. Other times we can't relate, and have nothing to really say. So for me, I choose to avoid threads that upset me (and that changes from day to day) because I think everyone needs to feel that they can reach out for support, have fun or be serious as they need to. I would hate for the writers to have to worry about the readers.
I'm afraid that is where I am right now.
I think the readers have to take care of themselves.
>
> So -- I think trigger warnings would be really helpful. Something like "playful sexual content" or whatever. Or maybe these things belong on social?
I put my post on social, but Dr. Bob moved it.
I will put in a trigger next time (that is, if there is a next time). I am trying to heal from 31 years of an abusive marriage, and need to feel safe to say what I want to.I think it is interesting, Happyflower (my buddy) posts this kind of stuff, and not too many people get upset (some do), but I seem to get the cricicism. It's very hurtful, so I probably won't do the playful stuff again.
It seemed---safe---to share what I did, but I see that it is not.
My t asked me how I was able to overcome a lifetime of abuse (physical, verbal and molestation),and I told him, 'my faith, sense of humor and wit." If it were not for my sense of humor, I would be drooling in a corner somewhere.
Again, thank you for your helpful, sensitive post.
Hugs, Ally
poster:allisonross
thread:586772
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051206/msgs/586808.html