Posted by Tamar on November 30, 2005, at 18:52:07
In reply to Re: Lipgloss, posted by LipGloss on November 29, 2005, at 22:06:55
Hi Lipgloss,
> I would like to say that I responded to Happyflower the way I did because the situation hit close to home. I will also say that I do not feel comfortable posting my own story here nor do I see it as benificial.
I’m familiar with the close-to-home feeling! In my case, I think that’s why I connect with Happyflower’s humorous approach so well… because that’s how I like to deal with the frustration of wanting someone so much… But I suspect you have a different story from mine…
> I truely care about her well being and in no way do I diregard the intense feeling she is suffering (yes, suffering) toward her T.I believe you really do care. And I’m glad of it, because I care about her too.
> I am saddened that so many of you that say you care about Happyflower and want to support her are egging her on to act out on these ideas she is entertaining. It's easy to be flip about things like this sitting in front of your computers. Heck, it's not your life after all.
One thing I would say is that I believe clients need to have the absolute prerogative to behave however they want to behave in therapy (short of actual violence). It is up to the therapist to handle any situation ethically. If Happyflower decides to offer her therapist her underwear, she is doing absolutely nothing wrong.
> Just entertainment for you I guess.
Sometimes we do entertain each other with fantasies of what we’d like to do with our therapists. This is probably because most of us have good therapists who aren’t breaking the ethical codes. I know that it is not funny for people who have been hurt by getting sexually involved with their therapists.
> I don't think Babble is the kind of place for me.
I think perhaps you’d be surprised. There’s usually someone here who can relate to almost anything you might say.
I got the impression that you’ve been reading for a little while and that Happyflower’s situation was the catalyst for breaking your silence. If that’s the case, I can understand it, because we just don’t know how things are going to work out for her.
But I want very much to trust Happyflower’s therapist not to hurt her. And I also believe Happyflower is able to negotiate the relationship with her therapist. In fact, she has already been negotiating it for several months. I don’t know how long you’ve been reading, but I think I can understand why you might think we’re irresponsible. On the other hand, I also believe that Happyflower is a responsible adult and capable of making her own decisions. I guess that’s why I’m inclined to join her in her humour.
I’d be happy to talk about this further, although perhaps shifting the focus away from Happyflower might be a good thing!
Best wishes,
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:583482
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051130/msgs/583838.html