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Re: Lipgloss » LipGloss

Posted by orchid on November 29, 2005, at 22:30:55

In reply to Re: Lipgloss, posted by LipGloss on November 29, 2005, at 22:06:55

Hi LipGloss,
As you may have observed, babble is one place which is exceptionally warm. There is not usually that much criticism of others here, and it isn't encouraged as well.

The reasons behind this kind of exceptional warmth and understanding comes from the fact that most of us here struggle a lot with different forms of emotional problems. Most of us here have suffered a wide variety of abuses and issues from childhood, and have very poor self-esteem and deep emotional issues to begin with. So, saying things very logically outright with brutal honesty doesn't work well here. I am not sure it works even with other people, but most especially not here.

But that doesn't mean you have to say yes to everything and support blindly every action and every wrong things people are doing here. I certainly haven't kept my mouth shut and said yes when I see someone is harming themselves or others or going in a way which I know is wrong. But the key is how you put your words across. And the basic thing people look for from each other here is empathy to their issues and feelings. As you know, with feelings, there really isn't a right or wrong. And even many actions don't really fall strictly under a right or wrong categories.

So when you say your opinion, if you say it softly and with empathy and understanding, and with consideration to the fact that feelings are a totally different ball game than rationality, I am sure your points will be taken well.

I did like your honesty, and I support your view point w.r.t to HappyFlower, but you have to understand the fact that she is in the middle of extremely emotional situation. If you have gone through transference with your T perhaps you might be able to understand that.


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poster:orchid thread:583482
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051118/msgs/583532.html