Posted by muffled on November 24, 2005, at 0:31:25
In reply to Re: Ok, ok, ok » muffled, posted by Damos on November 23, 2005, at 23:50:53
> Hey Muffled,
>
> Everyone okay? I'm glad you don't feel like hurting yourself, that's really, really good.***Yeah that is good. I'm very happy bout that. Hope it lasts.
>
> Thanks Muffled I think you're really sweet too. Wanna talk to me about what's going on with your T or what set off all the 'excitement'?***Oh its just silliness over my T not phoning me. Nothing really. And maybe there's some stuff I goto talk about that I don't want to. I don't think she gets just how much conflict I have inside. But I can't barely talk cuz i'm so nervous. I write stuff, but somehow by the time I stop getting nervous and/or dissociating etc, its time to go, so it doesn't get talked about. Kindof of frustrating. Some part of me feels like I'm just a giant pain in the *ss to her. I get mad at me cuz wheres rational me when I need it.
>
> Now you be sure to tell that little chickadee inside that I'm very flattered and honoured that she likes me so much, and it's important to me that she's safe and okay, but that it's you who protects and looks after her okay, and that when she gets scared and upset or needs anything, that it's real, real important that she finds a way to talk to you about it so you can help her.***She REALLY doesn't like me.
I know you love these little ones Muffled and that's the most important thing. Just the most important thing.
***thats the other thing thats REALLY bugging me. Maybe I don't, maybe I AM lying, maybe I'm just saying what I think I should say and I'm just saying to get what I want and I really don't give a sh*t about her cuz she has all the stuff i don't like.
I know it hurts big Muffled and the little ones too - I can feel that. But you know you have lots of friends here who care about you all and will help in anyway they can. And a lot of them know a whole lot about little kids.
***I should too.
>
> All families have missunderstandings and times when they don't get on so good, it's normal.***Oh God I hope so. I just don't know right now. I feel like we so far apart and I'll be fractured forever. I will never be whole. I'm a bad example to my kids.
>
> You all take care now okay. Grab a hot chocolate and curl up on the lounge again until everyone is okay and then try and have a good sleep and come back and talk to us some more in the morning.***I think we both just pouting now. I think she got me going sad too. I don't do sad. Sh*t.
>
> (((((Muffled)))))
>
***Thanks Damos.
Muffled:(
>
>
>
poster:muffled
thread:581770
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051118/msgs/581796.html