Posted by muffled on October 29, 2005, at 15:33:48
In reply to The effects of getting blocked » muffled, posted by ClearSkies on October 25, 2005, at 6:42:06
> Muffled, I was devastated by my block, even though I knew what I was doing when it happened. (I've owned up to this before.) It did create a distance between myself and babble that did not exist before. Every PBC I get makes me cringe. Am I unwittingly working myself up into another block? I know the FAQs - heck, I even printed them out when I was trying to become a deputy (bad idea!). I even bought a BOOK on civility... you see how much this place means to me?
Devastated. Thats not good. Seems if I get burned i goto be awful careful. I'm sorry you have to cringe here. It doesn't sound so safe.
>
> What am I trying to say? That I'm trying now to get some balance in my life. I try to walk away from the computer when it upsets me. I interpret my intense emotions regarding babble as a sign that I'm seeing situations in a skewed, out of proportional way that is unhealthy for me. I have nobody else to turn to but my friends here, so I'm trying harder to keep my perspective and not jeopardize these internet based relationships. I have no friends IRL besides the babble people I have met face to face - really! I place a huge value on these friendships.I need to find people to learn to reach out and stuff IRL. To practice. I dunno...
>
> You are not a bad person. You have so many people here who value your presence and writing here. What do you think the effect of your absence feels like to them?Proly they don't care. Noone REALLY does in this life. I don't want them to care. Caring is very problematic.
>
> Take a breath. Take a breather, even. Write this stuff down.
> But please stay.
>
> ClearSkiesI am so honored by your words. I am so perpetually confused. I think I get things figgered out. Then i get confused again.
Sorry. Thanks.
Muffled
poster:muffled
thread:571465
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051025/msgs/573102.html