Posted by pinkeye on July 26, 2005, at 13:21:29
In reply to Pinkeye, posted by Susan47 on July 25, 2005, at 22:22:07
Susan -
The one thing that I understood is to recover from this intense attachment and problems with Ts, the key is to somehow find a way to approve ourselves.. Nowadays, (not that long, just the past few days), I unconditionally approve of myself.. I tell myself I am a wonderful person, I am good, I am worthy.. And when I can't see the goodness in me, I try to imagine everyone else in the world - all the wicked people, murderers, rapists and think - well, if they can live happily, so can I. And days when even that fails, I turn to God to approve me - and think HE must love all his kids and so he would love me also..
And I try to think of my therapist's own problems in life.. Luckily I know some of his family's history, and I know some of the ugly things he has had to deal with in his life.. So I think after all he is also a human, and he has the same problems like I do, and who is he to approve of me? How could he alone be any better? And he isn't better than me - really. He was perhaps little more knowledgeable early on, or perhaps he learnt things from his own suffering, and I am sure he is a good person - but He is not God. He cannot be perfect. And I think why would a person with faults be the one to approve of me??
The key is to find some ways to like yourself.. And feel good about yourself. Don't judge yourself too much. Let Go of judging yourself and others.. Everybody copes up with life in the way they know best at that given time.. And try to be good to yourself and to others and if you can, develop some faith in God.. That is the only way you can gain some sense of self worth and then you will be able to let go of this T instead of hanging on..
poster:pinkeye
thread:532118
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050725/msgs/533753.html