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Re: Recipe for disaster? long Dinah

Posted by 10derHeart on April 9, 2005, at 11:37:39

In reply to Re: Recipe for disaster? long pinkeye, posted by Dinah on April 8, 2005, at 21:15:46

>>But that he didn't understand why such a remote possibility would come to my mind when he was leaving for a trip. (Duh. Little abandonment leads to fear of big abandonment. Is he really that dense?) And that most of his clients just say "OK" when he tells them he'll be away.

> He's such an imbecile sometimes.

Gosh I hate to agree with you there, Dinah, but he IS dense and has quite a blind spot if he *really* can't see the connection. I mean, it isn't even a hard one to get.

Hmm, I wonder if he really means that, or is he defensive around that issue with you? So he deflects it all with this sort of puzzled little response? And therefore, those aren't his *actual* beliefs? Just thinking out loud here - I'm sure I have no clue about your T. But with the different aspects your T. has, and you've shared a lot with us (thank you!), he seems generally bright to me. So he'd have to get this on some level...wouldn't he? Or it is too purely emotional is some way....?

I just realized why I probably latched onto this, other than the mere fact it's amazing he denies seeing this obvious connection. I think I just want hope this subject can be understood on both sides. My T's been away for a week, and although I've done OK if not great, I have some "being gone" issues to discuss with him. This is the first time he's been away since we started (4 months now). So I imagine because of that, this post grabbed my interest.

I'm curious - do you think there's any chance that was a bit of a b.s. comment?

Oh, and the remark about what other clients do probably would have elicited much rolling of eyes and complaining from me. I'm the type to ask for an explanation as to what on earth *their* reactions have to do with me, or our therapy relationship. Not that I don't know people can share similar reactions, but because if he's going to throw that little "fact" in as part of his case for being puzzled at my supposedly *unusual* reaction to his sudden trips, I'm going to want to make him work hard at justifiying it. ;-)
--10der (dubbed "challenging" by former T. - jury's still out with this one, but I'm surely working on it :-)




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