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Re: Internalizing » pinkeye

Posted by annierose on April 4, 2005, at 19:12:43

In reply to Re: Internalizing » annierose, posted by pinkeye on April 4, 2005, at 18:07:04

Interesting pinkeye - the difference between time fading or dulling the pain vs. healing. I understand the point you are trying to make, and I must confess, I don't know the answer.

However, going back to my story, last January I did call T1 (the one I quit with 15 years prior) and I am in treatment with her now. And I am so happy I called her, and not a new therapist. We are both different (in a positive way) and I am getting much more out of the experience this time. For one thing, I'm older (and so is she, and more experienced as a T) and financially, it's a bigger commitment now (my insurance paid 100% last time around).

So back to your point, those positive feelings I had towards her came back, but they are not as intense. But maybe because I'm in a better place than I was 20 years ago when I first started seeing her. Back then, I quit mid-session at least 5 or 6 times, kept getting 2nd, 3rd or 4th opinions. I laugh thinking back at how I behaved, but it is something I needed to go
through.

BUT ... if she had to terminate me suddenly for some unexpected reason (please no), I do think I would feel that ache in my heart once again, but knowing I would get through it one more time, a day at a time. And with my babble friend's help!!
-Annierose

 

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