Posted by thewrite1 on March 6, 2005, at 12:05:16
I've been dealing with something very specific and every time I try to go into session and talk about it, I just freeze, and then I get this pounding headache. I think my T is frustrated with me, but I know she understands I'm not just trying to be difficult. Well, I'm just tell you. It all revolves around shame. I just can't seem to talk to her about it, as if somehow what these other people did and their actions will somehow reflect on me as a person.
My T seems concerned about me, and that makes me be concerned about me. I think she's afraid I'm going to off myself. Some days that seems like a viable option. Other days it seems like a ridiculous thought at best. She even offered up her cell phone number, which I declined. It makes me feel good that she wants to be that reachable to me, but that's a line I don't want to cross. I'm trying very hard to maintain the boundaries of this relationship, which is something I've trouble with all my life.
poster:thewrite1
thread:467345
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050305/msgs/467345.html