Posted by LG04 on January 12, 2005, at 23:08:18
In reply to Re: T calling between sessions...what do you think? » lonelygal, posted by TofuEmmy on January 12, 2005, at 21:27:49
Calling really is an agonizing thing. My therapist and I tried so many different things to get me to be comfortable calling her. I did get more comfortable - maybe TOO comfortable! - as i think i also got more dependent from it. but boy did she help me thru some extremely painful times by being able to call her whenever i needed.
i'll never forget that when i was so incredibly anxious about starting group therapy for csa, she offered to call me each week after the session for a 10-15 minutes check-in, so i wouldn't have to go to bed without having a short time to process it. and the meetings ended at 10:30 p.m. at night! it's one of the nicest things she's ever done. the group lasted for four months and she never missed a call. and she definitely did it for me, for my needs, but for me that's what was so touching.
she's good on the phone, though she's also makes more "mistakes" with me over the phone.
even now, when we are long distance and i call her twice a week at predetermined times, i still worry about calling outside of those times (partially because we've worked at reducing my dependency and so i work hard at sticking to twice a week...actually some weeks it's not such hard work, other times it is). last week i was upset with her about something, i already forgot what it was, but i called her and said i only have 5 minutes to talk but i need to check something out with her from our prior phone call. then SHE got frustrated that i only had five minutes! (i.e. i opened something up yet said we only have five minutes to talk about it). well i had to admit to her that i had made it up, i actually had 30 minutes but i didn't want to be bothering her so i pretended i only had five minutes.
this is after two years of a very close, intense, extremely open, and loving therapeutic relationship.
yes, calling is a complicated thing.
poster:LG04
thread:441237
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050111/msgs/441431.html