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Re: What's real vs. what's transference?

Posted by daisym on November 20, 2004, at 22:15:02

In reply to What's real vs. what's transference?, posted by rockymtnhi on November 20, 2004, at 19:48:57

This is a really hard question because by definition transference feels real - and essentially the feelings ARE real. They are just misplaced or over blown. Why do you hate wanting your therapist to understand what you are going through? Of course you do! Isn't that what we all want, to be understood and accepted? And that is what they are good at, looking past our defenses and seeing who we really are.

As far as calling, there should be a whole book on this subject! I would guess that he means it when he tells you to call when you need him. It may have been your presentation that made him wince or whatever. Have you ever misread him before?

It sounds like you have entered what is fondly referred to as "the crisis stage" which happens when you are telling stories about the past. You feel like everything you are, all the walls that hold you together have been bulldozed. It feels awful. It is totally understandable that you want more contact with the person who is going through this with you.

Allow yourself to have what you need. Call him, just to touch base. You'll get through this.

 

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poster:daisym thread:418419
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041113/msgs/418461.html