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Re: return to therapy fires

Posted by gardenergirl on August 20, 2004, at 1:19:27

In reply to return to therapy, posted by fires on August 19, 2004, at 14:05:15

> For the first time since 1989, I am planning to see a therapist. CBT only, for physical illness coping.

This approach makes sense to me given what you have written in the past. I have one suggestion. You might want to find out if the therapist is a health psychologist. You may already know this, but this type of T has special training in physical ailments, the effects they can have on quality of life, and on behaviors that can exacerbate illness or faciliate wellness. He or she may be just what you are looking for if I am understanding your posts correctly.

I think it is very pro-active of you to let the T know up front about your rules. It certainly lets them know where you are coming from and what you expect. Thanks, by the way, for the reminder about using first names. I was brought up to never call my "elders" by their first name...always Mr. or Mrs. X. But it seems like things have become much less formal over the years. When I was working with older adults a couple of years ago, I was teased for being so formal. Hey, if they never said to call me anything else, who was I to use their first name? (Incidentally, it took more than five years for me to be able to call my now in-laws by their first names or as Mom and Pop. They never said anything! Didn't they notice I avoided calling them anything at all? I suppose I could have asked directly...). I admit, though, it's odd to me, probably because of our culture, to call someone younger than me my Ms. or Mr. etc. And I haven't yet decided what I want my clients to call me once I earn my doctorate. Dr. sounds too formal. I don't even like Mrs. right now. Hmmmm.

Now, I hope you don't mind if I share my own reaction to your rules in general. If I were the T and you presented me with this in our first session, I probably would have mixed feelings. I would appreciate your directness and honesty. It's much easier than trying to guess. You know, I'm sure, that T's are NOT capable of reading client's minds. ;) But I might also feel a bit intimidated. That I might fail to live up to a rule while caught up in the moment to moment flow of sessions. I suppose I would also want to know a bit about your prior experiences which may have shaped the development of your rules. I am someone who always likes to know why and how something is, not just to memorize facts. That way, if I can't remember something by rote memory, I can reconstruct it, albeit perhaps not exactly, by running through the why and how of it again.

Just my middle of the night insomniac reaction. I truly hope you find what you are looking for in this endeavor. I think there is a good T out there for a variety of needs. It's sometimes hard to match up, however.

Take care,




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poster:gardenergirl thread:379492