Posted by steelmagnolia25 on July 5, 2004, at 11:17:21
In reply to Re: resuming after termination? please help (long), posted by LostGirl on July 4, 2004, at 21:55:39
Thank you so much ladies. I know that I don't post here often and it's been somewhat hurtful to see only a few responses. I truly appreciate your input. The more I reflect on everything that happened, the more I wonder if T actually validated my feelings as non-transference just as a way to flatter himself? Or perhaps he wasn't equipped to deal with the "real work" of working through this issue even more? I mean, is it possible in only 4-5 sessions to discriminate whether feelings are tranference, not transference, or both?
Something happened today that is definitely pushing me in the direction of seeking another (female) T. I decided yesterday that I would send a very professional email to T regarding the parking ticket situation. I suggested that he simply write up the appointment slip that I needed, leave it with his receptionist, and I would pick it up Tuesday. I thought my email would be a good way to (1) solve a practical problem (the ticket) and (2) open the door IF he wanted to ask how I'm doing, etc. Well, the response I got was pretty weird. First, he responded that he'd "like" to help, that he would write the slip, but that he would prefer to send it to me in the mail. This despite the fact that the deadline for my ticket appeal is Tuesday (?!). I'm pretty angry now. I feel like his response was the "professional" response that will keep him safe since email is not private, but it pretty clearly communicated to me that he wants NO contact. And most importantly, he didn't ask how I'm doing -- nada! I found that to be extremely hurtful since he'd told me that I could contact him in the future if I still needed to talk. This was a very far cry from the response I expected or wanted.
I tried several drafts of an angry email back to him and finally decided that email is just not the venue for venting anger. Especially when I know he'll just limit himself to one of those ultra-professional responses. So then I called the after-hours number and I'm sitting here steaming and waiting for him to call me. I half suspect that he won't. If he does, I am very tempted to let out all of this anger and just ask for a different therapist.
Any thoughts on this crazy development?
poster:steelmagnolia25
thread:362402
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040703/msgs/363203.html