Posted by Dinah on June 10, 2004, at 12:12:45
In reply to Re: please rephrase that » Dr. Bob, posted by Miss Honeychurch on June 10, 2004, at 8:31:24
I think what Dr. Bob is aiming for is an I statement, how you felt when you read the statement. Instead of a comment on the statement or the maker of the statement.
So I think, "I felt (insert adjective here) when I read that", rather than "I think the statement was condescending" or "I think you were condescending." Let me think of some good adjectives you could insert - hurt? belittled? (I'd have to get Dr. Bob's opinion on "belittled" or "condescended to").
Or a statement that you are very happy for the other person that they don't flip out over daily stressors or minor incidents, but that to you those things aren't minor, and you don't appreciate them being characterized as minor, or your reactions being characterized as flipping out over daily stressors. That you feel you do important work with your therapist and hate to see it described in that way. That you certainly don't wish to flip out over a minor occurence but would appreciate your person and your problems being treated with respect.
Perhaps you could wait for Dr. Bob to respond to this thread before saying more in case I'm giving you bad advice here.
And Dr. Bob, perhaps you can infer from my post here that it is my opinion that you might have missed some things on this thread. Perhaps you could revisit it?
poster:Dinah
thread:354179
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040603/msgs/355421.html