Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | List of forums | Search | FAQ

sorry, it takes a while.... fires

Posted by karen_kay on June 12, 2004, at 19:36:23

In reply to Re: LucyStone - Re: Bothered, posted by fires on June 7, 2004, at 18:00:34

i've learned the reasons for my anxiety. i remembered events from my childhood that directly caused me to be overly-anxious. it had a lot to do with me not feeling in control, which would cause me to 'flip out'. i don't mean raging or ranting, but i'd pace entirely too much if i felt that circumstances brought to me a feeling of not being in control. and there were other indicators that caused me to almost lose touch with reality, in a sense. showering (and closing my eyes in the shower was not an option. when washing my face, i'd have to wash half my face at a time so that i always had one eye open.) was a traumatic experience in itself for me. and i never could figure out why, until i was forced to talk in great detail about my past (what little i could remember). or, the fear of going to sleep, even with a light on. i realized why i would feel my heart racing and why i had to sleep with a light on.

any matter in which i felt i had no control (over my body or the situation) caused me utter panic. i'd pace. i'd cry. i would find it hard to breathe or even move. it's funny (you brought back some things, sorry if you find this boring) that i can still remember laying in bed and being fearful for my life. even with a light on, i would time my breathing to be sure no one could hear me breathe. i wouldn't move even if i had a cramp or an itch.

and vacuuming or drying my hair (anything that made noise and i wasn't able to hear what was going on around me) for a while was out of the question. in a sense, i was terrified somethign was coming to get me. and when i first started therapy, i thought that something was the devil or the boogey man. i realized, through therapy, just what i was afraid of (my father). i've realized that he isn't coming to get me. i've realized that i no longer have to live in fear. and i realized all of this the moment i understood what i was afraid of and why. (and i really thought i was going crazy before i realized what it was i was afraid of.)

so, to answer your question, i'd flip out when i was in a situation that caused me to feel as though i had no control (probably also stemming from my mother) and i'd become anxious when i wasn't completely aware of my surroundings. once i realized what i was afraid of, i haven't had that problem.

btw, i didn't take your comment to be condescending in any way.




Post a new follow-up

Your message only Include above post

Notify the administrators

They will then review this post with the posting guidelines in mind.

To contact them about something other than this post, please use this form instead.


Start a new thread

Google www
Search options and examples
[amazon] for

This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | FAQ
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:karen_kay thread:354179