Posted by fallsfall on April 15, 2004, at 19:39:07
In reply to I can't find it funny, but..., posted by Racer on April 15, 2004, at 16:10:41
Racer,
I'm sorry you had such a rough DBT session. I did 6 months of DBT, and I can see how it could be amazingly frustrating when you don't recognize your feelings. That is actually the reason I went INTO my DBT group, but my guess is that I recognized more feelings than you do. I can also SO understand feeling shameful when you couldn't recognize your feelings. One of my biggest triggers is when I don't know something (anything) that "everyone" knows, or that I'm supposed to know from training I've had. A couple of sessions ago I was telling my therapist that I had gone to the library to research the Unconscious (Somehow I managed to live the first 47 years of my life knowing in theory what it is, but believing that *I* don't have one). He didn't believe me when I said I didn't understand the unconscious - I can't believe how painful these events are for me. So please don't feel like you are the only one.
I have learned to recognize my emotions better (except of course for anger and rage - they still do not exist for me). I think DBT was helpful. There is a list of "emotion" words in the workbook, organized by type (love, hate, sadness etc). I typed them into my computer and printed each type of emotion words on a different color paper. Then I cut them apart with scissors. I call it emotional confetti. One of my favorite activites with it is to dump it on the floor, and then pick through looking for words that apply to me right then. Seeing the words, and then deciding if they were "me" that day helped me to name some emotions. It is also fun to do with a friend - you can compare your selections at the end - or hand over words that you think might describe them.
This stuff is incredibly, incredibly hard to learn. I think most kids learn it around ages 2 - 4. But I sure didn't. I think it is easier to learn when you are 2. But don't give up. You are not shameful - somebody just didn't teach you what you needed to know - that is their shame, not yours. You are not a failure, and you are not doomed to never know this stuff. I hope it helps you to know that you are not alone.
Been there,
Falls.
poster:fallsfall
thread:336453
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040409/msgs/336729.html