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Clarification of what I meant about CBT

Posted by Racer on March 27, 2004, at 14:53:29

In reply to ??? about therapy models, posted by Racer on March 26, 2004, at 10:19:37

These days, language is not my friend. It's really hard to get the energy up to explain what I mean, so I'm using a sort of shorthand. I think what I said about CBT looking like a recipe for making me sicker wasn't very clear, so I'd like to try to explain what I meant a little more. If it's still not clear, oh well.

I'm very, very good at coming up with reasons not to say what I'm feeling, talking myself into denying my feelings, saying to myself, "Well, you shouldn't feel this way, or think this way, so think this other way instead." That's not healthy for me, because it does lead me to bottling things up even more inside myself. Telling me to look at something from another perspective just isn't very helpful for me, because I can and do already look at almost everything from all sorts of perspectives -- because that allows me to repress what I'm actually experiencing.

My understanding of CBT is that it tries to teach patients how to stop the negative cognitions, in order to arrest the negative behaviors. You know, "you're in a negative thought rut, so break out of it and explore a more positive way of thinking, in order to behavior in a healthier way." That's great -- when it works for a particular patient.

It's also something I try to teach my riding students when I'm teaching. Stop thinking about the Might Be and start thinking about the What Is. It really and honestly does work, and is very, very valuable.

Where it becomes a problem for me, is that I spend so much time and effort using that as a coping strategy, I lose my feelings and experiences entirely. I know that I feel great distress about my father's death, for example; I know a great deal about why, but I can't process it and move on. What I need right now isn't someone to help point out other ways to look at my experiences, I need someone to help me reopen old wounds and let them heal. The more it's about specific here-and-now behaviors, the less I get what I really need in order to move on. Here and Now are bad enough, but they're filled with bushels of old pain that can't be set out on the curb to be hauled to the dump. They're blocking my way outside of this prison.

So, if I'm looking for someone who can help me pack up that rubbish and get it carted away, is there any model of therapy that I should be looking towards? (And, yes, I know that it means finding a good therapist, rather than just going by the model they use. That's a whole 'nother subject, though.)

Thanks, and I hope that's clearer.


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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:Racer thread:328671
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040327/msgs/329127.html