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Re: Another Writing Assignment - Wishes lonelygirl

Posted by Pfinstegg on March 20, 2004, at 21:30:18

In reply to Re: Another Writing Assignment - Wishes Pfinstegg, posted by lonelygirl on March 20, 2004, at 20:48:44

He almost always responds with some brief words, or sounds (like mm..) letting me know that the wishes are OK to have. Sometimes he says, "I'm glad you were able to tell me that". Then, he is quiet again, so that it's up to me to go on with the thoughts and wishes. There isn't much in the way of long explanations or interpretations by him. As we go along, I am getting always closer and closer to the wishes (and also the rage and disappointment) I have towards my mother and father, the first alcoholic and often sadistic, and the latter quite depressed- and not much present as a mother during my earliest years. These are early, right-hemisphere type communications, involving a lot a pain and longing; he is careful to try to remain in a right hemisphere mode also- mostly empathizing with my feelings by using his feelings and his body language. This type of communication helps the most in terms of my feeling understood, and finding ways to lessen the pain these experiences have left inside me. Not that he has said so, but I think this way of communicating is quite taxing for the therapist, as it invariably taps into his own unconscious painful experiences, which, although much less than mine, must exist.. So he has to be accepting and empathic of my pain, while dealing with his own, also. I think it is amazing that so many therapists have the stamina and courage to do these things, hour after hour, and day after day.

I was joking a little about "experiences best left to the imagination". That naturally makes one think of sexual longings for the therapist, but in truth, even those give way quite rapidly to the basic longings which were unmet in childhood. At least, I find that this is what happens to me.
Well, that is as honest an answer as I can give at the moment.....




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