Posted by spoc on March 13, 2004, at 23:25:20
In reply to Re: Do you and your t. say l love you ever?, posted by pegasus on March 12, 2004, at 13:43:53
Hi all,
I had very strong feelings for a pdoc for awhile, and maybe the point *is* to give free reign to them to play out -- I'm not sure. But instead, I forced them back in check ASAP because I felt selfish "falling in love" with someone and dreaming of its reciprocation based only on a scenario that was allll about me me me. I imagined idealized qualities about him as a person and knew I liked how safe I felt with him, but realized this didn't mean I actually *did* know him or give back to him through the equal two-way flow that real love grows from. I also fancy myself to be likable and engaging as a client but that's still not the 50% contribution a "partner" deserves to be getting in return. Do main stream therapists really have no problem with expressing "love" for a client; without reminding them that their feelings are normal for the setting but not "real?" Without the reality of the fact that it *isn't* reality thrown in, it would seem like many clients would have a harder time separating and applying the improved loving skills in more appropriate places.
But then while I enjoy researching just about anything, I've purposely stayed away from researching psy theories and factors much, hoping it would make me a clean slate for getting help with no preconceived notions. But I've already seen that has been a mistake in some ways.
poster:spoc
thread:323332
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040313/msgs/324109.html