Posted by Penny on July 16, 2003, at 15:20:55
In reply to Re: Same sex therapist? No No., posted by pinkeye on July 16, 2003, at 14:47:31
> This therapist-patient relationship is so pathetic in some ways. It takes a really great capacity to reveal everything about yourself to someone and not feel attracted to them. And to realize that they probably don't care as much for you as you do for them is even worse.
Well, they don't care for you in the *same way* that you care for them - after all, it is a career for them but real life for you (I'm not sure if that's what I mean exactly...)
But, they do care - or they should, if they're worth their salt. I think you can tell. My former therapist was very concerned about me, my pdoc spends a great deal of time with me and wants to know everything about what's going on with my life, and is there for me even in the middle of the night if I need him to be, and not for a fee. He actually cuts me a break with his fees. My current therapist cares enough to give me her home phone number and her cell number so I can get in touch with her if I really need to. I know she thinks about me between visits b/c she will come in with insight on something we talked about previously.
It is a hard relationship to categorize - that's what's so difficult for me. No one in my family or among my friends really understands it. They don't understand the attachment like the folks here do. But I see the therapeutic relationship as a very important one and one that can easily be abused by an unprofessional therapist.
But I think that *most* therapist (I would hope) are not in the business for money - they are in it to help people. Not that good money isn't a benefit, but they're being paid for what is probably a very emotionally draining career. I guess I see the fee as being something of a formality, to ensure that there is a professional boundary, but the caring is for free. At least, that's how I feel. I guess I see it that way because my therapists and my pdoc have gone out of their way, above and beyond, to be there for me even when I couldn't pay them the full amount or pay them right then. They certainly don't have to do that. That's one of the ways I know they do care about me.
poster:Penny
thread:241865
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030711/msgs/242598.html