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Re: how to get out » medamorphosis

Posted by hyperfocus on October 4, 2010, at 1:24:42

In reply to Re: how to get out » hyperfocus, posted by medamorphosis on October 3, 2010, at 23:36:34

The essential idea at the core of NA and AA is that you can't beat this stuff by yourself. You know that compulsion you get - the single-minded thinking that leads you inevitably to use one more time? The completely rational and plausible narrative your mind builds in order to use again after your last time?
"Just one more time, then I'm done. One more time, what's the harm. I won't go all the way this time, I'll pull out early. How can I live this way if I'm always thinking about it, might as well do it. Oh man I'd do anything just to have one more. It won't be so bad after, really."

Every nerve in your body, every neuron and cell seems oriented to the idea of using one more time. And eventually you give in and do it. And feel the incomparable shame and self-loathing after you come down. And you promise yourself never again....until the need starts again.

NA and AA believe you can't beat that by yourself, and they're right. You need other people and you also need help outside of what other people can give you. Every day, hour, minute, second is a battle against it. Your sponsor can't be with your 24/7.

As far as belonging or not belonging, well Jesus said he actually wants to help the lowest of the low and they're actually going to get saved before the highest.

You can access any kind of Bible verse online, this is Job 7:

1 "Does not man have hard service on earth?
Are not his days like those of a hired man?

2 Like a slave longing for the evening shadows,
or a hired man waiting eagerly for his wages,

3 so I have been allotted months of futility,
and nights of misery have been assigned to me.

4 When I lie down I think, 'How long before I get up?'
The night drags on, and I toss till dawn.

5 My body is clothed with worms and scabs,
my skin is broken and festering.

6 "My days are swifter than a weaver's shuttle,
and they come to an end without hope.

7 Remember, O God, that my life is but a breath;
my eyes will never see happiness again.

8 The eye that now sees me will see me no longer;
you will look for me, but I will be no more.

9 As a cloud vanishes and is gone,
so he who goes down to the grave [a] does not return.

10 He will never come to his house again;
his place will know him no more.

11 "Therefore I will not keep silent;
I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit,
I will complain in the bitterness of my soul.

12 Am I the sea, or the monster of the deep,
that you put me under guard?

13 When I think my bed will comfort me
and my couch will ease my complaint,

14 even then you frighten me with dreams
and terrify me with visions,

15 so that I prefer strangling and death,
rather than this body of mine.

16 I despise my life; I would not live forever.
Let me alone; my days have no meaning.

17 "What is man that you make so much of him,
that you give him so much attention,

18 that you examine him every morning
and test him every moment?

19 Will you never look away from me,
or let me alone even for an instant?

20 If I have sinned, what have I done to you,
O watcher of men?
Why have you made me your target?
Have I become a burden to you? [b]

21 Why do you not pardon my offenses
and forgive my sins?
For I will soon lie down in the dust;
you will search for me, but I will be no more."

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Job%207&version=NIV
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm%2010&version=NIV
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm%2025&version=NIV
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm%2023&version=NIV


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poster:hyperfocus thread:964401
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faith/20100403/msgs/964647.html