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Re: what I'm planning on trying - Simus

Posted by KaraS on August 7, 2004, at 14:26:55

In reply to Re: what I'm planning on trying - Simus » KaraS, posted by Simus on August 7, 2004, at 1:13:52

> Hey Kara,
>
> I have not been ignoring you. I just have been very busy lately.


No problem. I recognize that some people actually have a life. Please don't feel the need to get back to me immediately. I don't want our conversation to be an extra stressor or burden.


(No, not searching through all of the Holiday Inns looking for Larry. But now that I think about it... LOL)


What a riot you are! Didn't you just roar when you saw Larry's response the other day?


>
> Wow! You have done some homework!


Thanks. I used to consider myself very knowledgeable about supplements and antidepressants until I started participating here. It's been quite humbling yet I am so happy to have the help and the feedback.


> I have had enough bad reactions to so many drugs and some supplements that I would rather stay at so-so than take the chance of upsetting the apple cart again. Is that too pathetic??? Once in a while I will try something new though. I still want to study up on some of the things you have listed because I have never even heard of them.
>

I have done a lot of homework - but not nearly as much trying of things. Again, I am more like you. I am afraid to try things (I too have had bad reactions) plus my anergia and avoidance personality disorder have not made me very proactive in that respect. Unfortunately, it's "no pain, no gain" or should I say "no risk, no gain" in this case so I know that I have to push myself more.

What things are you thinking of trying and how are the supplements you're taking now working out? If there's anything in particular you're interested in, I can probably direct you to some good information. The "Adenal Fatigue" book you recommended says that I should be quitting caffeine. I knew it was going to say that but I dread the thought of giving up my beloved java (if I think it's hard gettin out of bed now...).



> By the way, do I remember you writing that you are on sick leave or disability? My doctor put me on an extended sick leave back in February and I was immediately replaced. But in all fairness, it wasn't a job that could sit open for weeks, or even days. I do miss work. But every time I think about looking for a job, I have to wonder how in the world I would be able to pull it off in my health condition. Who would hire me like this??? >


It does sound like you are missing work but it's probably also quite nice not to have that pressure on you right now so that you can heal. You still have the future and it sounds like you've made a lot of improvement. Your depression is much better on the Wellbutrin and your adrenal fatigue is better because of your program to address it, right? What would you say are your worst symptoms right now that would make work difficult? Brain fog? Lack of memory? Energy level? Depression? You have previously stated your line of work - which I imagine would require a lot of concentration, attention to detail and speed (as does mine).

I wish I were on sick-leave or disability. I'm just plain unemployed and running out of money. My family is much better now but they still astound me. My mother recently said, when I told her that I was having some bad side effects from the Rhodiola, "Oh, why are you bothering with all that stuff?" The level of ignorance and denial that I have had to deal with is just staggering. But enough of my complaining...


>(Just curious - what is/was your line of work? You don't have to answer, of course. But I just picture you as a very bright professional woman.)

> All the best to you,
>
> Simus

Thanks. I have an MBA but have never really lived up to the degree. My jobs have not been very high level for a number of reasons. Aside from the depression and debilitating symptoms, I chose a field that was not right for me at all - for all of the wrong reasons (which I won't bore you with today). Changing careers at this stage of the game is not going to be easy either.

My last job was a nightmare. I didn't actually get fired as I chose to leave because my boss was not happy with me at all. This was despite the fact that I worked so hard (never left before 8:00 at night) and saved his butt a couple of times due to my accurate reading of situations and foresight in addressing them. I have since learned that he was on his fifth person in just over a year so I know it wasn't entirely my fault. I did have symptoms that slowed me down a lot and the lack of energy was too apparent yet he also had very unrealistic expectations. In addition I had a back-stabbing co-worker who paraded as a friend. It was so much more than my already fragile, rejection-sensitive self could stand. I have been working doing some temporary work for a couple of places recently. One of these experiences has been quite good for me. I get some positive feedback and enjoy the people a lot. It gets me out of the house as well, which is good in and of itself. I just need to do much more and soon.

I'm hoping that this Perika (the most dopaminergic and stimulating of the St. John's Wort formulations) I started on recently and an adrenal fatigue program (still being devised) will give me the boost I need to start making much needed initiatives very soon. I'll keep you posted as to what works for me.

In the meantime, I'm off to hunt for Larry!

Take care,
Kara


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