Posted by floatingbridge on July 19, 2011, at 22:26:47
In reply to Re: Update- My experience with ECT, posted by alchemy on July 18, 2011, at 7:57:07
Alchemy, how long ago was your initial ECT therapy? I wish I knew more about this. I imagine you need some confidence to encourage you going forward.
School isn't a bad idea, IMO. I am curiuos what others think about this. It sounds like work is an act of endurance for you right now.
Will you post an update? When you write below about a jump into the unknown, I'm unsure what is being referred to. There seem to be a number of major decisions you're facing :-/
> > Alchemy, did you start ECT? How is it going?
>
> I am actually in the middle of figuring it out, so I haven't started. But even this morning I was wondering if I should start tomorrow.
>
> Someone who has been training me at work asked if I was even interested in my job or planning to leave. She was nice about it, I'm probably just not hiding the fact that I'm barely hanging on.
>
> She also said she plans on even loading my training schedule more - which means there is a huge conflict with ECT memory & work. My dept. has also become so busy that my boss would not be letting me take the time off I need.
>
> So I feel like I'm in a no-win situation, but I need to get off this miserable ride somehow. And when it's been like this my whole life, I'm nearing 40, do I take the jump into the unknown?
>
> After feeling like I am having a nervous breakdown, there is one possibility I thought of. Quit to go to school for fall. Even if it is only a semester I at least would have a reason for another break in my resume. I still don't know what I want to do, but I would just hope that I would feel better to have some kind of motivation. Even if I felt well I still wouldn't really like my job.
>
> I should apply for dissability at the same time - not knowing which way I will turn out. But I don't want to live like I'm just barely hanging on. This sucks.
>
> It's all a gamble. I do know that I will lose some memory & I will feel better for at least a little while. So besides all of my anesthesia fears and my work issue - will maintenance keep me up? That is my big question.
>
> Advise?
poster:floatingbridge
thread:84785
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110714/msgs/991434.html