Posted by floatingbridge on June 24, 2011, at 20:25:37
In reply to Re: Are MAOI's used when SSRI'S dont work?, posted by emmanuel98 on June 24, 2011, at 18:57:11
Well, I'm done with him. It's very stupidly complicated and utterly ridiculous. He thinks I have chronic ptsd and do not need medication, or maybe I do, but he's not sure what, but he made sure I look at the idea that I was at least psychologically addicted. Well, so? I am capable of looking at that, but if I ever get a brain again I will write an essay on the treatment of patients with anxiety
and phobia. He asked me if I knew why addicts became addicts and I just looked at him and said well I have quite alot to say about that, which I do, but we didn't even have time nor place for that.I felt like Alice at the tea party, only
because I kept repeating well, yes (or no, depending), BUT can you please help me sleep until the first week of July when I go to the clinic?It seems very thoughtless and cruel to withdraw all treatment from a person
who is suspected of having an 'anxiety disorder' who can become terrified at night. The absurdity was that he absolutely did not mean to be cruel.Thank goodness my husband was there to mediate. He said later, "you two don't
communicate very well." We laughed a little, but frankly, I'm shot to pieces now.I went to the urgent care (the walk in doctors) and they at least spoke to me
and gave me a trial of ambien an said to
call again on Sunday. It was a small comfort that someone in real life registered that I had a real need and that it was not wise practice to let someone begging for some medication to be untreated. The urgent care doctor made sure that I am not suicidal, and encouraged me to use the ER at night--I didn't need to be suicidal to go, and that someone would help me. He understood, using the term 'patch through' as in You want something to help you patch through to your next visit.That I have been reduced to begging feels very raw. I feel invisible, (not at the urgent care. I felt very real there,) and
that my pitiful refrain of 'help me sleep'
was some damning evidence I should
examine. I was told today that no one ever died of insomnia, that the body resets, blah-blah, and after a full two weeks off the emsam he could begin to
think of treatment options.The urgent care doctor was going to give
me xanax until I could see a primary doctor in the system, but I said, look, I
just, just went through the withdrawal window and am back to raw nerve. Let
me see if I can sleep. If I can't sleep by Sunday, I will come back.After three years, that he is only getting a
clue that I had life long insomnia and 'anxiety' and not maybe not depression feels pretty damn sh*tty. I certainly know far more about myself now--more than he does.I really do not think I will be trusting doctors again as both therapist and psychiatrist. This was way too much power and control for me in the long run. I don't extend that comment to your situation because for you it is working :-)
I am sorry to give you such an unedited reply. I am just really wrung out. I imagine I will be examining this experience for some time.
Thanks for listening.
* and whoever gazes at the stars will never again be quite alone...
c-ptsd & attendant health concerns
poster:floatingbridge
thread:989095
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110619/msgs/989345.html