Posted by hyperfocus on April 9, 2011, at 0:30:30
In reply to Re: To the depths of despair with Risperdal-SI trigger, posted by Phillipa on April 7, 2011, at 11:35:42
I honestly haven't found a doctor that could tell me exactly what's wrong with me. All my symptoms are connected and they all usually simultaneously get better or worsen. I have all the symptoms of C-PTSD; but a couple of them are sort of exaggerated. Each doctor I go to I'm only able to articulate and describe like 1 or 2 dimensions and then they decide that the other dimensions are outgrowths of the core ones. Like I tell them about the social phobia and paranoia or about the depression and the racing obsessive thoughts, or about the dissociation that started together with the SP but has become a separate entity entirely, or these acute dysphoric states when part of my own mind seems wholly focused on destroying itself. I can't figure out what's primary and what's secondary. The thing that has always puzzled me is that I'm able to sort of hold it together and describe what's happening to me but I can't seem to fix myself emotionally. Like my mind is split into 2 with one half observing andd taking notes and the other just convulsing with pain and anxiety and all the rest. I don't know if this is a result of the dissociation or is what caused the dissociation...it's all beyond me.
But I am getting better I think. Thanks for your concern.
poster:hyperfocus
thread:982139
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110406/msgs/982314.html