Posted by janejane on January 18, 2010, at 19:01:19
In reply to pity party at my house: three day remission over, posted by floatingbridge on January 18, 2010, at 16:04:48
Oh, fb, I'm so sorry you're feeling bad. You so don't deserve it.
It's funny but I've been feeling pretty stable lately (knock on wood), and I actually caught myself wondering today how I could ever have been depressed. (On the other hand, when I'm down, I can't remember what it's like to be normal and wonder why anyone would bother to live since it's so obviously pointless and unbearable.) It's so unfair that mood can be so fickle and independent of will, isn't it?
Don't worry about whining. You're allowed. You can hold my hand if you want, though I must warn you, it tends to get sweaty. (How do you make the emoticon for blushing?)
Your Stanford appointment is coming up, right? Maybe that can be your little beacon of hope to help get through the next week.
Just out of curiosity, does this downturn have anything to do with your menstrual cycle? I'm asking since it seems pretty sudden, and this is how it sometimes happens for me. I definitely have 4-5 days per month when there is a much greater tendency for me to feel abysmal. (Other times can be bad too, but the most dismal, dreadful, tearful days seem to be associated with that certain time in my cycle.) When it happens, I try to tell myself that the worst will be over in a few days. Until then, I just keep the tissue box handy and try to pamper myself. I'm really not looking forward to menopause since part of what gets me through the really bad times is their predictability.
What things do you like to do to be nice to yourself? Have you done any today? I'll put a vote in for chocolate and flowers. Chocolate for obvious reasons (in ice cream form is especially good). Flowers just feel so wonderfully indulgent, even if they're only a $5 bouquet from the grocery store. When I buy them, I'll put the vase in my office in view of where I'm sitting so I can look at them intermittently. I find that enjoying their beauty and smell provides a little bit of a distraction from ruminating thoughts. They also help to make me feel special and deserving of good things.
I don't want to buck the trend here, but I think we should all strive for full remission. I actually read this in a psychopharm book, and I think it's a good goal to have. Never give up on feeling better. I lived with partial remission for a long time and regret having compromised. My goals are loftier now.
poster:janejane
thread:934207
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20100113/msgs/934255.html