Posted by chocamine on November 22, 2008, at 23:27:55
In reply to Re: Treatement resistant bipolar depression..., posted by desolationrower on November 22, 2008, at 18:36:09
Wow! Thanks for all the replies, guys! I REALLY appreciate it.
I've been doing heavy exercise, supplementing with vitamins and high-dose fish oil for years now so that's not a variable.
The thing that worries me the most is that even though I "fit" the textbook model of a bipolar patient there are 2 things that don't make sense;
1) I have absolutely no family history of mental illness on either side going back as far as we can trace.
2) I never had mood swings of any kind until my first hypomanic episode.However, to counter that, my hypomanic episode was DEFINITELY textbook mania. I had massive delusions of grandeur. I basically thought I was a messiah. I felt like I was on a special mission sent by God and I felt at one with the universe. IT wasn't just the burst of energy, creativeness and good mood... it was sooo much more. I didn't think anything was wrong with me. I thought I was some sort of "chosen one".
So now it is as bad as that was good... if it makes any sense. I feel the complete opposite of that.
It was a blaunt trauma when the depression hit because my life was going perfectly. Job, girfriend, social life, etc. I felt like all my problems were over.
Then I Started getting severe migraine headaches above my left eye that lasted a week and after that the crash came in. It is like day and night.
In any case, at least I've had the privilege to lead 20 happy years of a normal life. I sort of feel like I'll never get back to that state again but maybe it's just the depression talking.
I just hope I find a med that works. I see a lot of people are recommending antipsychotics but do they really work for depression ?
poster:chocamine
thread:864627
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20081114/msgs/864800.html