Posted by corafree on January 25, 2007, at 21:13:36
(I've not edited this because if I sit here too long my anxiety may rise, so it may be sketchy and ill put together.)
Now, I can state with quite a bit of certainty Eff-XR did help my anxiety somewhat some years ago. Even then though, always needed an accompanying benzo.
I believe I've built a tolerance to it.
Now I'm nearly 2kws off of it. I feel LESS DEPRESSED!
My education says Eff-XR is supposed to be best at attacking anxiety. (Wonder then if even a possibility of Cymbalta working any differently.)
My experience says this too.
THIS POST IS ABOUT WHY CAN'T MY ANXIETY BE TREATED W/O AN ACCOMPANYING AD???
The SSRIs exacerbated my anxiety.
I DO NOT FEEL THERE IS AN AD THAT WILL HELP MY ANXIETY. (Ideas welcome of course, but my net search and my experience w/ so many diff' ADs and mood stabilizers ... I'm at my wit's end to start another AD hoping it will ease what Valium 10mg 3x a day will not.
I THINK ADs ARE DEPRESSING ME! :o
Yep, I feel less depressed than on Eff-XR. The withdraw s*cked but I feel rationally less depressed this eve.
Do I have to choose between depression and anxiety or both?
My P will not allow me a back-up benzo alongside Valium, like Klonopin, or go the other way w/ a fasting-acting for attacks, like Xanax. He flat out said he won't do it.
Being in the system and w/o any support, it's hard. Once filed a complaint when benzos being held back and 'the entire complex' dis'd me. I had to drop it or got a doc' who must have been away during the whole thing. I did bring up the issue that my conversations were 'being taken out of context'; just recorded word for word and read by a diff' doc or T that doesn't know me and my personality, and can't know about the seriousness of my statements.
(I try suggest Ps, Ts, pls write (she laughed) or (she cried), not just what I say in their notes.)
Anyway I finally got a doc in the same clinic to take me. (Hey ... that's when I got the P that dc'd Klonopin cold turkey and I had the resultant NB! I just realized that.)
I BELIEVE I NEED A LONG AND SHORT ACTING BENZO.
After all these years ... no AD has worked 4me w/o a benzo. There was no depression in my life before there was anxiety. I've said b4, first came the anxiety and then the depression. Anxiety caused me to do things which later embarrassed or made me feel bad about myself. That's when I was labeled depressed. So, the horse is anxiety and there's unhappiness in the cart, ... really I think so ... unhappiness, but call it depression if it pays better. I dunno!
I feel myself getting anxious as I am editing. Gotta stop. Just gonna' post the rest of this as is.
Here alone, no friends, don't care for city, ICM out of pic' partly good/partly bad, low finances, an old car thankfully paid for, a nice place simply because my mother is a realtor but has heart dz so sense of security nonexistant.
Now, if I can experience all this and say 'no it's not depression I'm feeling', well I think I'm using my coping skills well. I'm reminding myself that just because there is no one with me, there are people that love me. I'm reminding myself that my world isn't going to fall totally apart if I don't touch base out my front door for a few days.
But, w/ anxiety and panic attacks, my coping skills are very limited as I often know not why I'm having an attack or am anxious.
The attacks are painful and make it difficult to do deep breathing.
Somewhere in me is A FEAR OF I DON'T KNOW WHAT FOR SURE. I can't receive whatever that therapy is called that digs that out of me. I've been told by many it's ancient and less effective. And it's definitely not offered in the system.
IF I KNEW THE FEAR, maybe I could see the rationale of it and maybe see that it isn't life threatening.
I wonder just exactly what it is. Could it be the loss of a loved one or the loss of me?
tks4followups, cf
poster:corafree
thread:726532
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070125/msgs/726532.html