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Re: Tonight I don't feel that antidepressants work » Phillipa

Posted by SLS on September 20, 2006, at 23:43:46

In reply to Re: Tonight I don't feel that antidepressants work » SLS, posted by Phillipa on September 20, 2006, at 22:01:34

Cry, babe, cry.

I think this one is good for you.

If you don't already, why don't you share some of this stuff on Psychology or Social? But only do it if you feel safe there. Only do it if you see that other people feel safe there. I think it is safe here. Maybe it is safe there too.

You can buy a book on CBT. They have workbooks you can process at home and practice with. Ask about them on Psychology. My dear Jan, you have too great a wealth of mind, heart, and soul inside you not to invest in clearing away the trash and allowing yourself to enjoy yourself and the world around you.

Now...

> Where does this fear come from?

I'm not sure.

> Heck I can't even make a phone call, pick up a library book,

Is it fear or inhibition?

Do only certain situations bring on anxiety or is the anxiety there all of the time?

> not that I can concentrate

Do you have difficulties concentrating when you read?

Is concentration difficult only when there is anxiety?

Do you have difficulties with your memory? If so, can you describe some examples?

> and I don't want to die.

I'm just a little confused here. Do you want to die?

> I'm also afraid of that and think of it constantly.

Are you afraid to die as you age, or are you afraid that you might commit suicide?

> Everywhere I look people are younger than me.

This is something that you must find peace with. In the meantime, it might help you to look around and see people who are older too.

> And I used to get men looking all the time.

Hey! Me too! And women. I used to be a head-turner on both sides of the fence. Glory days.

> I have no selfesteem.

This is something that you will not find in a pill alone. I would loan you some of mine, but I am rather short on it myself. If you have a biological depression, your self-esteem will inevitably suffer. Once you find the right pill, it does not inevitably return - you have to do the work to clean up the mess.

> Even the guy who owns the place where greg is painting self-employed on boats said you have a scowl and you're angry.

Yes. Depression changes one's countenance - the contraction of facial muscles. It changes our posture. It changes our muscle-tone. It changes our bowel function. It changes so many psychological and physiological functions, it is hard to imagine one illness being responsible for so much disturbance to one's being.

> And I wasn't it's just something I can do nothing about as a long furrow between my eyes across my nose. Hence the botox Thread. I even had a plastic surgeon tell me he could do nothing.

That's ok. You'll pretty up fine once we get you smiling again.

> Today I confronted him as told him I hadn't been angry and he hurt my feelings by saying I looked mad. He didn't acklowledge my feelings just told me to get laid seriously. And that hurt a whole lot.

Some people do not respond well to "I" statements. They either feel uncomfortable or simply don't give a damn. This is usually a reflection of their shortcomings in my estimation. It is certainly not a sign of strength. Can you imagine the lack of self-esteem a man must have to say such a thing to a woman? You just continue to be honest with yourself and ask for help from those who are in a position to give it. Everything else will fall into place. Remember, your husband might not be in such a position right now. If you ask him for it, he might just pull away. Cruel reality.

What will your insurance pay for?


- Scott

 

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