Posted by Bob on January 24, 2005, at 13:15:30
In reply to Aggressive thoughts, posted by tensor on January 23, 2005, at 7:12:32
> Hi,
>
> I'm not sure if this is due to lithium or if it's due to the depression. And i don't remember when it started, but i've recently become more and more aware of it. I often catch my self thinking violent thoughts, i unconsciously building up scenarios in my head where i'm acting in self defense and hurting, disarm and fighting other people(the 'bad guys'). Is this due to loss of self-confidence or is it medical? Do you recognize this?
> I surely not dare to drink alcohol now, last time i did, a week ago, i was banned from two local pubs. And i didn't even get through the door, i threatened the guards that i would beat them. I have no memory of this, a friends girlfriend told me. And i have never beaten another person in my entire life, never been charged or convicted for assault. It's like i'm living out my thoughts while drunk.
> This scares me, i'm pretty large(188cm, 100kg), so i could potentially harm someone. Is it the lithium or what?
> Thought, ideas and experiences greatly appreciated.
>
> /MattiasI would have to say, with my unfortunate 15 years of experience with these meds, that anything is possible. My most recent med combo was lithium + welbutrin, and I had mega anger problems. I eventually tapered off the Welbutrin, for many reasons, and much to my chagrin, the anger was still there despite the fact that I was on lithium monotherapy for months thereafter. Sure, I guess I could have doubled the dose and bombed myself out until all I was doing was laying there sleeping 18 hours a day (which I've done on other meds), but I chose not too. So maybe you can increase the dose and it will calm it down, but then I would think tolerability would become an issue. It seems to me, the only people who do well on robust doses of lithium are ones who have an underlying tendency to mania - they had an extreme excess of energy to begin with. If your baseline is a lack of energy, lithium alone doesn't seem to be a solution. Again, I can only speak for me - YMMV.
I would like to second the comment someone made above concerning Remeron: that was a very, very activating drug. It fed my obsessions and my anger. There is not a day that goes by, where I don't marvel at how little we know (or, put another way, how much we still have to learn) concerning these disorders.
poster:Bob
thread:446110
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050124/msgs/446823.html