Posted by Kristi on June 24, 2001, at 14:26:42
In reply to Get comfy...I've got a mini series pending:o), posted by yo-wazzzup on June 24, 2001, at 13:57:48
You've got a mini series is right!!
I can't even put into words how reading that made me feel.... I couldn't put in to words how extraordinarily strong I think you are!
I truly hope you did your time so to speak... and the rest of your life will be amazingly happy. You definately deserve that. I think your daughter is wonderful to have YOU.......
I can honestly say, I don't know a single soul that has been thru the amount of crap you have been through and survived. How strong you are. You really are an inspiration. Anyway, not much to say... just wanted you to know youve just ranked up their on my hero's list. Good luck to you, and may only wonderful things start coming your way. Take care, Kristi
> (sigh) Hi Dana,
> I'm 29. SWF. Mother of 2. My daughter is 9. My son is 7.5 months. Come from a long line of...unstable individuals. My Grandmother has been hospitalized several x (she see's things that aren't there,etc.). She's afraid of people & goes out of her home 2 times per year (if that).My Mom & her 3 sisters have all been or are currently medicated for anxiety/depression,etc. My Dad talked my mom out of taking meds. when I was a baby b/c he believes they're band-aids & don't really help. I grew up in a disfuntional home (who didn't?). Mother depressed/ rage-aholic. No drug or alcohol abuse in the home but verbal, mental & physical abuse ran rampid behind closed doors. Father was a work-aholic. When he was home, he was usually repromanding us for what ever upset Mom during the week. I have a brother that is 2 years older. He's a career criminal. Lots of juvenile crap, his first 'pen bit was 4 shooting an unknown homosexual "just to see what it was like". Fortunately the guy lived. He was shot once in each shoulder & @ the base of the neck. There's still a piece of shrapnel that cannot be surgically removed @ the base of his neck. The crime was pre-meditated the target was 'just there'. He got off attempt murder b/c he had a good LIAR. He claims to have only wanted to shoot tail lights out of cars & to be high on various drugs @ the time. They forgot to mention he sawed off the shot gun 5 minutes before putting shoe polish on his face & leaving the house. Neglected to state that he was a trophy winning shooting range cadet in air cadets when he was little. He was 18 when he threw his life away. He has been in & out of prison on various assaults, thiefts ,etc. He's a coconut(cocaine junkie). I don't associate w/him. Me...I was taken away from parents @ 13b/c of abuse issues. Juggled from foster home 2 foster home . Abused in care (by brother sexually, by foster parents emotionally/verbally,etc.). Chronic runner. To this day parents claim I ran away 2 children's aid, was not aprehended for anything they did wrong,hmmmmm? I was born in Ontario, Canada. Raised in Wpg, Manitoba. Lived in SEVERAL cities across canada since 17 yrs.old. Her's the juicy stuff. I've had 4 changes of I.D. because of a stalker. He unlawfully confined me for 9 hours & tortured me beyond belief during that time. He claims if he can't have me no one will. No, I'm not in witness protection, I wouldn't co-operate w/police out of stupidity & fear for my daughter's life. One of the arresting officers Stalked me after my release from hosp. & women's shelter & sexually assaulted me. There was an internal invest. but the investigators convinced me not to press charges as it would be too difficult 4 me to go through 2 trials @ once (I'm sure they had MY best interest @ heart). The officer received a repromand.I've been running ever since ... It goes much deeper but I'm skimming for y'all. I've legally changed I.D.'s 3x & went underground 4 a year waiting 4 the govn't to lift a moratorium on the process of securing an unlinked I.D.My cousin commited suicide 2 yrs ago. She was taking anti-depressants. My family has dis-owned me for various reasons. I wasn't supposed 2 let then in on any of the id things but, I did...I couldn't bear the thought of them thinking I was dead. Well, should've left it @ them thinking I was dead b/c that's how I'm viewed. Blood isn't thicker than water in my family. Fear of the unknown particularly my situation with the stalker is not the least of which. Dis - belief in the whole ordeal. Even though they eithere saw my magled body after of saw copies of charge papers...My life seems like a bad movie. No - one can have that much bad luck,right? What ever. (sigh) I didn't have a crimminal record up until 2 months or so ago. I'm facing thieft under $5000.00 x 2 for events I have NO recollection of. (more details in previous posts). This is the first time I've actualy stuck it out with meds. & this is the ummm, thanks I get,hmmm? That's a whole other story though. I have PTSD, & post pardom depression. I'm getting assessed for the first time in 10 years by a psychiatrist on the 5th. I'm commit phobic. Haven't laid down serious roots EVER. I'm a wreck.I have serious trust issues. I pray each day my kids don't aquire mental issues. I wonder what kind of an example they see in me. I'm an awesome Mom-most of the time. Sometimes I see the rage-aholic (my mom) come out in me. Family, I wish my babies had extended family. I'm all they have. It saddens me to see my daughter long for a father she'll never know.(between us, she's the product of a rape)...Her little face drops when other kids brag about their Grandma's & Grandpa's. Well, I'm depressing myself here. I'm sure Im not putting smiles on anyone elses face. Sorry. At this piont in my life there aren't many Uplifting thoughts. My children are my life. I wish I could provide more for them.My life's moto...EXPERIENCE IS WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU DIDN'T GET WHAT YOU WANTED. ;O)
poster:Kristi
thread:67535
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010618/msgs/67678.html