Posted by Cece on March 2, 2001, at 20:36:51
In reply to Re: 'virtual' therapy » Cece, posted by Steffany on March 2, 2001, at 19:28:07
Hello there-
I recently started taking Adderall! I used the word "daydreaming" in trying to explain to my pdoc what was keeping me from getting my work act together (I have my own business, and just haven't gotten it back together in a real way since I had a major come-apart about 5 years ago). He said that that word was most commonly associated with ADD, which I don't have the absolute classic symptoms of, but as we talked about it, it seemed a direction worth exploring. I had tried a stimulant (Cylert) several years ago to try and clear brain fog- it worked great for about a week and then starting driving me up the wall. But I wasn't on the spectrum of mood stabilizers that I am now on (have you investigated mood stabilizers at all? they can really be miracle workers and there is a new generation of them available now- Neurontin, Topomax, and Lamictal. A regular GP isn't going to know how to suggest one for you or how to dose you- their use for mood disorders is off-label, even though they are widely used by pdocs). So anyway, I like Adderall- it has helped me to focus my thinking better, although I still tend to hop from one thing to another and be distractible. I can only handle a small amount- 10mg/day- or I get really hyper. Sometimes I take an extra 2.5mg in the evening if I start to lose it and need to focus. My doctor said that for people who have ADD, that Adderall calms them down- sounds like your reaction, so maybe that's part of your picture.
Do you know about using the "Tips" section? You can search topics/drugs and read tips sent in by pdocs describing their patients' reactions to different meds and their opinions about their usefulness- it's really neat. I went there today to check out a drug that I had heard people mention in posts- naltrexone- and as it turned out, it was mentioned several times in the treatment of self-injury and substance abuse.
As opposed to some other psych bulletin boards (like the Panic Disorders board run by a Dr. Stuart Shipko), Dr. Bob seems to stay out of the way here, except as you say to be an occasional Mr. Manners, but I think that it is possible to mail him. I hope so- could you even travel to Chicago occasionally if you could get really top-notch help there?
I have a seasonal affective disorder also, but the reverse of the common one. I really get the heeby-jeebies (sp?) and then bad depression in the summer, when most people are living it up. It feels like the bright light, and especially glare are attacking me. In the winter, I enjoy the calm and quiet (I live in N. Calif.- SF area, so our winters are mild), although I do get frustrated by the short days, as I like to spend a lot of time outside. Spring and Fall are my favorite seasons- balanced light day to night, interesting things happening in nature, change in the air.
BUT, this last summer things changed- maybe because I was starting on Lamictal, not sure. I actually enjoyed (most of) the summer- only got the oppressed feelings briefly and was able to work with them okay. I actually lost my chronic social withdrawal and started dating again after a long hiatus. Now this winter, I'm not enjoying the season as much as I used to, and have been having problems. But also, I just got out of a relationship that I started last summer which was fun, sexy, but also depressing and frustrating- a dead end because of the guy's many defenses and our different styles. I went with him for 7 months and never told him about my psych stuff- I just didn't trust him to handle it. I would slip out of bed after hours of intimacy and go to the bathroom and take my meds. Kind of strange, but I know now that I was right and protected myself in a positive way. So,we'll see how I feel once I get through this separation pain. Hard to have this happen at the same time I'm changing doctors- separation is not my forte. But I'm doing much better with it all than I might expect given my past patterns- only obsessing moderately and not falling into a huge black pit (knock on wood).I'm sure that you are not stupid, hateful, or ugly. You seem like a really neat person. But I understand those kind of feelings and social phobia.
Cece
poster:Cece
thread:54711
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010302/msgs/55389.html