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Re: Any advice on relationships during depression?

Posted by Cindy W on March 29, 2000, at 9:46:51

In reply to Re: Any advice on relationships during depression?, posted by A. on March 28, 2000, at 21:58:27

> This is my thought on the matter:
>
> It seems that when a depressed person gets medical treatment, the whole idea of being "treated" becomes a reality. For me, when I was taking prozac a few years ago, it dawned on me I had to admit I needed medical help for the depression. The very acceptance that there is a problem leads to self analysis on all levels, it seems.
>
> You may begin to look at yourself for signs of change, once the medication starts. Or you may start to look at your behvaiour and become aware of your reactions and response to normal situations, as now that you are being treated, you may expect to see an improvement or change there. This may be unconcious...
>
> What I mean is, for me, when I first started, I knew I was taking the next step. I began to look at my entire life and realize how long the depression had been eating away at me. Now that I was taking treatment, I was hopeful. Hopeful for the first time in years. So now not only did this hope inspire me to continue medication, I also began to "clean house" in my head. I wanted to sort out all my feelings. I had a boyfriend at the time who for years had taken advantage of me, so suddenly he was surprised when I started to "see" what had been going on for the past few years. He thought the medication changed my personality and feelings toward him, but in reality, I only was reflecting on myself and new situation and came to this amazing conclusion that he was totally wrong for who I really was.
>
> Of course, that is my unique situation. The point is, you may be going through the self reflection as well, as a result of taking a step to change your life by taking AD. During this phase of adjustment b/w being the depressed person and the treated person, you may feel like being alone so you can analyze everything, and rediscover yourself. It doesn't mean you're falling out of love, it just means you are adjusting and need some time and space. Allow yourself to think and explore why you've been depressed and how being not-depressed is going to affect you. Some people are so used to being depressed that the very idea that they are getting better throws them off guard and they aren't sure how to react to their new "life."
>
> I just think once your depression is alleviated for a set amount of time you will begin to settle in to your self, and you'll find yourself able to continue to your relationship. Probably the stress and guilt of neglecting your bf is affecting this period in your life and amplifying the negative impact.
>
> Anyway I just hope this helps at all. I'd try to stop worrying about your relationship (be open with your bf, however, don't just abandon him), and just go with the flow of wanting to be alone for awhile.
Relationships? Sounds vaguely familiar, but I can't remember what it's like anymore.


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poster:Cindy W thread:26865
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000321/msgs/28384.html