Psycho-Babble Medication | about biological treatments | Framed
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Thanks Ellen!

Posted by thewife on August 27, 1999, at 17:13:50

In reply to Response for the wife, posted by Ellen on August 22, 1999, at 7:38:10

>Thank you for your thoughtful response.

I am moving from the anger to understanding and a bit of forgiveness, while taking care of myself. Yes, I am in therapy, and it's helpful to make me realize when to help, and when to not become his therapist.

I can't believe his doc, who just told me this was all a midlife crisis. But I've figured out that that was the doc's own issue with missing the diagnosis and not assessing risk properly.

I hope this was "hitting bottom" enough for him to make honest efforts in therapy along with the meds. I know they can't do the whole job. He had issues before I met him that have nothing to do with me, but everything to do with his self-love and coping style.

Do you have any suggestions on what is helpful from a spouse versus not?

Thanks again, Ellen. Glad to hear about someone who has faced their own demons, even if it needs to be a day at a time. You give me hope!


>.First I want to let you know that I think that you persistance to help your husband is touching. Alot of women would not but up with what you are going through and I think that you need to give yourself some credit for that. I to have manic depression and being on the other end from where you are I know how difficult iit is for you to live with this. I watch my own husbands frustrations. One thought for you, remember to take care of you through all this also. You can not take care of your husband unless you take care of you. It is had to deal with the kind of anger that you are feeling alone. I would suggest that you try to get come counseling yourself. It will make you better abled to make decsions about your marriage and help you to see through all this in a clearer light. . ANger is a very poweful emotion. Don't let it get the best of you. Now to answer your drug questions. All drugs effect people differntly. I was on Topomax and I had definite cognitive dulling, slurred speach etc. I am know on 3000mg of Neurontin and 2,5 mg of Klonopin. I still go up and down but my anger is far more undercontrol, and my depression is much better. I do alot to take care of myself. Your husband as to want to get better. I have found through years of fighting this illnes drugs alone don't cut it. Will and determination. If your husband is waiting for a cure all with the drugs it is not going to happen. The drugs for me just put me in a place where I can help my self to deal with my illness, accept my illnes and do what I need to help my recovery. It is a life long effort. But he needs to do some to. You can't fix him. FIx you first. And then you will be better prepared to help him. Good luck! Ellen




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