Posted by Roo on August 13, 1999, at 7:27:53
In reply to Happy Birthday, Dear Janey, Happy Birthday to you!, posted by Racer on August 13, 1999, at 1:19:42
Hi Sweet Janey Girl (I love your name),My heart goes out to you. Birthdays are special
to some people, and not to others. They are very
special to me, and if I get forgotten, it hurts.
I've been there, where people forget, and it's
made me sad. Kind of made me feel like "dosen't
anyone care about me? Do I matter or make a
difference in anyone's life?". I kind of felt
like a sorry ole lump of clay.What to do? Oh, I don't know...I could give all
sorts of corny self righteous advice...it dosen't
seem like enough somehow...I want to tell you to love yourself, be good to
yourself, but that's so hard...such a long journey..
it dosen't happen overnight...maybe buy yourself a
present b/c you're worth it...maybe get a dog or
cat from the shelter and learn how to love yourself
unconditionally from their example (b/c they
love us unconditionally).About family, and how to make it not hurt so much...
god...that's a tough one...
I don't have a good relationship with my oldest
sister and it really hurts. I keep wanting to cut
things off with her to end the hurt, but I find I
can't do that. As much as I don't want to care about
her (because she can't return it in the way that i'd
like) I can't stop caring. I realized the other day
that until I can accept her for who she is and stop
wanting her to be who I wish she was, the hurt will
never stop, and I'll always be angry. I know I'm
a long, long way from there. So that's frustrating.
I just pray that one day my heart will be more open,
and I can accept things the way they are. I aint
there yet, not by a longshot, but that's my goal.I guess there's not really much I can do for you..
just tell you what I've been through, every person
has their own path.
just know there's a person in North Carolina who
read your post, was touched, and is thinking about
you, sending warm fuzzies your way :-) Roo
poster:Roo
thread:9979
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990726/msgs/10011.html