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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 25. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by ClearSkies on March 3, 2016, at 16:00:49
The social network and support this place gave me was unmatched. I've made some extraordinary, long standing friendships here. I am pretty isolated since moving across the country, although I do not regret it.
I wish we could get this going again.
Posted by Tabitha on March 3, 2016, at 16:44:57
In reply to I do miss babble., posted by ClearSkies on March 3, 2016, at 16:00:49
> The social network and support this place gave me was unmatched. I've made some extraordinary, long standing friendships here. I am pretty isolated since moving across the country, although I do not regret it.
>
> I wish we could get this going again.We can try, right? It's nice to see you :-)
Posted by SLS on March 3, 2016, at 19:24:03
In reply to Re: I do miss babble. » ClearSkies, posted by Tabitha on March 3, 2016, at 16:44:57
> > The social network and support this place gave me was unmatched. I've made some extraordinary, long standing friendships here. I am pretty isolated since moving across the country, although I do not regret it.
> >
> > I wish we could get this going again.> We can try, right? It's nice to see you :-)
Yes. Please try!
- Scott
Posted by ClearSkies on March 4, 2016, at 21:27:42
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by SLS on March 3, 2016, at 19:24:03
Yes, we can try.
How about we fill each other in on the past couple of years? Scott, I know you have been trying to achieve a level of functionality, as have I. It's so hard.
CS
Posted by SLS on March 5, 2016, at 7:40:12
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by ClearSkies on March 4, 2016, at 21:27:42
> Yes, we can try.
>
> How about we fill each other in on the past couple of years? Scott, I know you have been trying to achieve a level of functionality, as have I. It's so hard.Over the last few years, my goal has been to function well enough to go back to work. I imagine an improvement in depression of 50% would have been adequate. So far, I've come close, but can't seem to make any significant improvement last for much longer than a week. I am currently worse than I've been in awhile, but I can account for this by my attempting to discontinue a drug called prazosin. Right now, I don't see any new medication for which I feel optimistic that it will be effective. There is one drug that I am hoping will add some minor improvement. It is a replacement for Abilify called Vraylor. It was approved in September, but has not been shipped to pharmacies.
Socially, I am fortunate to have two good friends and family. I am missing a relationship with a significant other, but I don't want to end up with someone who is bad for me. I am not actively looking, but am not averse to meeting someone through serendipity.
- Scott
Posted by baseball55 on March 5, 2016, at 18:45:23
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by ClearSkies on March 4, 2016, at 21:27:42
Good to hear from you! Just before you stopped posting, I had left my husband with whom I had lived for 37 years. It turned out to be the best thing I ever did for myself. Until I left, I hadn't realized the degree to which he made me feel inadequate and stressed out and ate away at my self-esteem. My desire to please him and make him happy also meant that I was constantly trying to do things I thought he would like and never really thought about what I would like.
Now I'm taking classes, studying an instrument, going to concerts and plays with friends (something he had no interest in), traveling abroad (ditto)..
When I moved, I got rid of a ton of stuff and completely de-cluttered my life. Washed that man and everything else right out of my hair. My mood is more stable because I'm not being triggered constantly.
>
> How about we fill each other in on the past couple of years? Scott, I know you have been trying to achieve a level of functionality, as have I. It's so hard.
>
> CS
Posted by ClearSkies on March 7, 2016, at 11:34:30
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by SLS on March 5, 2016, at 7:40:12
Scott, you are so persistent with your confidence in trying different medications. I'm wary, having experienced only a few shattering let downs.
During my move across the continent I went immediately into benzo withdrawal. I'd neglected to fill my scrip from my Florida doctor for the last time. I developed - as expected - loss of large motor function, the ability to concentrate or communicate effectively, to sleep....the usual misery. With a country to cross. I was so very fortunate to have a friend making the journey with me, able to navigate, drive, and take care of me. It was my first serious suicide attempt.
Most recently, I was cross tapered onto Brintilex from Lexapro, again with disastrous results. Suicidal ideation landed me in the ER for a circus of a day, when mental health services evaluated me and decided the best option was to train me for peer to peer support through NAMI. (Shaking my head.) once again, close friends helped me through a difficult time.
I'm feeling pretty stuck, personally. The odyssey of my divorce started in August 2014 is ongoing. None of the assets I'm legally due have been transferred. A misguided (on my part) relationship has dumped me, a blessing in disguise. Fully on my own, my isolation has lead me to having few friends.
I'll be OK. It is taking longer than I thought.
Posted by ClearSkies on March 7, 2016, at 11:41:44
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by baseball55 on March 5, 2016, at 18:45:23
I'm so very proud of you and happy! I'm currently on the last day of my first out of country visit, and enjoyed the true independence enormously. Self pity really seems like a waste of my time.
I have had some daunting challenges for myself, but I think things will settle down. Feeling the remoteness of my new location. My uncle, for whom I moved to the area, is a big trigger for my PTSD. I totally did not expect that. He actually understands, which makes me love him more.
I sing out loud, I dance in my living room. My cat Psycho died last summer and she told me I needed to rescue another cat. We get along beautifully.
Life is good, really. Just some hitches.
Posted by ClearSkies on March 7, 2016, at 11:42:40
In reply to Re: I do miss babble. » ClearSkies, posted by Tabitha on March 3, 2016, at 16:44:57
So, forgive me for not following, but how are you???
Posted by Tabitha on March 7, 2016, at 19:52:30
In reply to Re: I do miss babble. » Tabitha, posted by ClearSkies on March 7, 2016, at 11:42:40
> So, forgive me for not following, but how are you???
Thanks for asking. You didn't miss anything-- I haven't posted much for the past couple years.
I laughed when I read that you named your cat Psycho. :-)
I am doing well. My life is stable and very low stress right now. I'm like a cross between a young-ish retired person and a housewife, which is a bit weird, because career was the biggest thing in my life for so long. I miss some aspects of my job but not enough to look for another one. I do hobbies and volunteering. Still fighting depression but feeling much better since adding lithium.
I hope you settle into your new town and get your meds straightened out. Stopping benzos is horrible even when tapering. It took me almost year to get off of Ativan.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 10, 2016, at 1:59:39
In reply to I do miss babble., posted by ClearSkies on March 3, 2016, at 16:00:49
> I wish we could get this going again.Hey.
I'm still here. Not as frequently as I was before... But still... I am still here. I am still here. Etc.
It means a lot to me that other people are still here, too.
Maybe Bob... He means a lot to me (being honest, here). But even if Bob wasn't here anymore... Other people mean an awful lot to me, too. I really like hearing that other people are still here and that here still means something to people.
The internet has gone kinda weird... The masses took over etc. And now we have government surveilance (especially for me, here, where my government basically sold me out such that I might be data to better inform the decisions of governments who are more willing and able to look after the populations they serve...
But I miss Babble a lot, yeah.
I mean... It was here for me during... My summer scholarship... Masters... Portions of my Phd... Most of my life, yeah. It has been there for me.
I wonder how Bob is doing... I get that he has probably retired. ANd it is good of him to keep things going so we can still post here / read the archives here at all...
But I f*ck*ng miss him heaps.
And others, too, of course. But yeah, I miss him heaps.
Posted by ClearSkies on March 10, 2016, at 10:28:55
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by alexandra_k on March 10, 2016, at 1:59:39
>
> > I wish we could get this going again.
>
> Hey.
>
> I'm still here. Not as frequently as I was before... But still... I am still here. I am still here. Etc.
>
> It means a lot to me that other people are still here, too.
>
> Maybe Bob... He means a lot to me (being honest, here). But even if Bob wasn't here anymore... Other people mean an awful lot to me, too. I really like hearing that other people are still here and that here still means something to people.
>
> The internet has gone kinda weird... The masses took over etc. And now we have government surveilance (especially for me, here, where my government basically sold me out such that I might be data to better inform the decisions of governments who are more willing and able to look after the populations they serve...
>
> But I miss Babble a lot, yeah.
>
> I mean... It was here for me during... My summer scholarship... Masters... Portions of my Phd... Most of my life, yeah. It has been there for me.
>
> I wonder how Bob is doing... I get that he has probably retired. ANd it is good of him to keep things going so we can still post here / read the archives here at all...
>
> But I f*ck*ng miss him heaps.
>
> And others, too, of course. But yeah, I miss him heaps.
>
>
Me too. It's that abandonment thing for me. He just...stopped being here. Quietly and resolutely.
I care about the people here very much. Sometimes too much. But we are here; here for each other now.Something of a legacy for Dr Bob to have left, certainly.
Posted by Tabitha on March 10, 2016, at 12:33:03
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by alexandra_k on March 10, 2016, at 1:59:39
> And others, too, of course. But yeah, I miss him heaps.
>
>It is weird that he stopped posting at all. I mean, I can understand not wanting to keep up the level of intervention he used to do, but it seems like if he's going to bother to keep the site online at all, he'd also stop in every few months just to let us know he's there.
If Scott hadn't said he's emailed him, I would be suspecting Dr Bob was severely ill or even dead.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 14, 2016, at 2:31:11
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by Tabitha on March 10, 2016, at 12:33:03
I worried for a bit that something had happened to him, but people said they'd emailed him, yeah.
I guess... He's been reducing his involvement here for a while. Reducing it over a period of years, really.
And before he did... He was posting a bunch of stuff about leadership... And about doing what was best for the group... And about how it maybe wasn't best for the group to be too dependent on one leader in case something happened to the leader...
My biased take...
He'd been talking about reducing his involvement for a while... About other people taking a more active role. Deputies and the like. Had been trying to hand things off / over, even.
I guess the thing was that most of the people who were here... Were here because of him. I mean... There always were a bunch of other consumer run boards... For people so inclined. Thought they tended to rise up and fall apart as the people did. Bob was more... Resiliant. Stable... Something...
It is pretty impressive that he played as active a role as he did for so very long IMHO.
I miss him a lot...
How old is he now? I ask because I'm about 37 now (I forget). But when I started on these boards I was only... Not a first year... During honors... After some time out... Anyway... I was a lot younger... How old is he now? Retired? I don't know...
I miss Dinah a lot, too. She meant a lot to me. Her involvement, here. Her values / ethics. Which were a bit alien to me in some ways... But in other ways... Were pretty crucial for, uh, holding things together. I think. Her ability to post to... Make most people feel welcome. Feel heard. Feel part of things. Her kindness. Her caring. Her compassion.
Other people too, of course...
I don't know what I would have done without these boards and (all) the people who posted to them over the years. Before the internet got taken over by... Every 10 year old with an internet connection and the ability to copy-paste... By drug reps and other reps and pyramid schemes and so very (very very very very) much money to be made...
Posted by Tabitha on March 14, 2016, at 17:50:34
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by alexandra_k on March 14, 2016, at 2:31:11
> How old is he now? I ask because I'm about 37 now (I forget). But when I started on these boards I was only... Not a first year... During honors... After some time out... Anyway... I was a lot younger... How old is he now? Retired? I don't know...I think retired is a good guess. I checked the Univ. of Chicago site and he doesn't show in the faculty directory. So he must have left for some reason, or else I'm not searching right.
>
> I miss Dinah a lot, too. She meant a lot to me. Her involvement, here. Her values / ethics. Which were a bit alien to me in some ways... But in other ways... Were pretty crucial for, uh, holding things together. I think. Her ability to post to... Make most people feel welcome. Feel heard. Feel part of things. Her kindness. Her caring. Her compassion.I really miss her too. A really special individual. I haven't given up hope that she'll drop back in someday.
>
> Other people too, of course...
>
> I don't know what I would have done without these boards and (all) the people who posted to them over the years. Before the internet got taken over by... Every 10 year old with an internet connection and the ability to copy-paste... By drug reps and other reps and pyramid schemes and so very (very very very very) much money to be made...
>
>Yeah, I miss the old days when it was non-commercial, and the people online were generally brighter than average. Seemingly kinder than average, too.
Posted by baseball55 on March 14, 2016, at 19:25:00
In reply to Re: I do miss babble. » alexandra_k, posted by Tabitha on March 14, 2016, at 17:50:34
> Yeah, I miss the old days when it was non-commercial, and the people online were generally brighter than average. Seemingly kinder than average, too.
>
>
Maybe babble was Kinder, but I remember being on a list-serve when the internet was pretty new and non-commercial and the constant flame-ups drove me crazy. Really nasty stuff and people (like Lou) who seemed to be there only to cause problems. I thin that's the nature of internet conversation groups. When you're not communicating face-to-face with people, things can get ugly easily. It's sort of like the way people behave in cars, where they see themselves interacting with other cars, not with other people. Like cars that drive up to the very end of a merge, then force their way in. The same people would never think of cutting in a line.
Posted by SLS on March 15, 2016, at 8:41:57
In reply to Re: I do miss babble. » Tabitha, posted by baseball55 on March 14, 2016, at 19:25:00
> > When you're not communicating face-to-face with people, things can get ugly easily. It's sort of like the way people behave in cars, where they see themselves interacting with other cars, not with other people. Like cars that drive up to the very end of a merge, then force their way in. The same people would never think of cutting in a line.
Exactly.
- Scott
Posted by Phillipa on March 15, 2016, at 9:34:37
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by SLS on March 15, 2016, at 8:41:57
By the way Dr Bob is on LinkediIN. Lists him as head of Psychiatry University of Chicago. Phillipa ps still on facebook too.
Posted by Tabitha on March 15, 2016, at 14:49:14
In reply to Re: I do miss babble. » Tabitha, posted by baseball55 on March 14, 2016, at 19:25:00
> Maybe babble was Kinder, but I remember being on a list-serve when the internet was pretty new and non-commercial and the constant flame-ups drove me crazy. Really nasty stuff and people (like Lou) who seemed to be there only to cause problems. I thin that's the nature of internet conversation groups. When you're not communicating face-to-face with people, things can get ugly easily. It's sort of like the way people behave in cars, where they see themselves interacting with other cars, not with other people. Like cars that drive up to the very end of a merge, then force their way in. The same people would never think of cutting in a line.So true. I forget what it's called-- disinhibition? My partner gets flare-ups of road rage when cars cut in front of him, which is funny to me because he's so sweet and non-confrontational in person. For me, I try to think of other cars as inanimate objects, or robot-driven or something. So I guess that's just another way of de-humanizing the humans in cars. Makes it less aggravating. Actually I try to think of internet trolls as robots, too. Doesn't work when people are truly vile though.
Posted by Tabitha on March 15, 2016, at 14:53:43
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by Phillipa on March 15, 2016, at 9:34:37
> By the way Dr Bob is on LinkediIN. Lists him as head of Psychiatry University of Chicago. Phillipa ps still on facebook too.
Hi Phillipa! Nice to see you. Yeah, I saw the linkedIn profile. It's possible he just hasn't updated it recently. Anyway it was weird I couldn't find him on U of Chicago faculty directory.
Posted by Phillipa on March 15, 2016, at 16:45:24
In reply to Re: I do miss babble. » Phillipa, posted by Tabitha on March 15, 2016, at 14:53:43
Is interesting time to google. Thanks for the heads up Phillipa
Posted by alexandra_k on March 16, 2016, at 3:46:51
In reply to Re: I do miss babble. » Tabitha, posted by Phillipa on March 15, 2016, at 16:45:24
john suler. online disinhibition effect.
i thought he left the uni a while ago... i think someone said... private something... something... i don't know.
maybe he got his small group, after all.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 16, 2016, at 3:53:06
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by alexandra_k on March 16, 2016, at 3:46:51
I find people try and jump the cue ahead of me fairly often. Because I don't squash up. If I join a cue I look around to check that I'm not cue jumping... Most people don't. Most people will jump up a cue if they can.
Here... People will even join their friends up ahead. It's quite common for a group to send out a sentinal. In lectures someone will arrive and attempt to save seats for people who aren't there yet.
Walking... I was thinking the other day just how much like driving it is. You get *ssh*l*s who speed up to overtake you then walk right in front of you and slow down... You get big guys who don't show any sort of chivalry at all... Gangs of unruly youths, even...
Nursing students are pretty bad. Med students, too. They teach them to walk around in packs of 6 or 10 or whatever. And to huddle up, huddle up. Otherwise everyone would be tripping over them when they get into the hospitals, I suppose.
It's really rather horrific.
How small this city can be... And yet how horribly, horribly overcrowded...
Not overcrowded, really, just freaking disorganised... How a group of about 6 people can wreck things within a 2 mile radius (of how many people???) with their freaking noise...
Sigh.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 19, 2016, at 2:58:45
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by alexandra_k on March 16, 2016, at 3:53:06
the walking thing... I don't get it. just today i was waiting at the lights for the cross signal. so a group of about 4 girls come up. walk in front of me. they want to wait in front of me for the cross walk signal, even though i arrived ahead of them and they could have grouped themselves to the left of me or to the right of me or even behind me. but no, in front of me they want to be. and then the person who stands right in front of me will turn around. like i'm supposed to interact with them all in a group like. i think it is like that. that they want to interact with me. that it's a way of forming a group around me.
but it makes me feel pretty f*ck*ng angry, to tell you the honest truth. firstly, it's fairly f*ck*ng rude to get up the front of someone, like that. with your back to them. second, it's fairly f*ck*ng confrontational to do that to a person by themself when you are in a f*ck*ng group. thirdly, it's pretty f*ck*ng weird to have your back turned to where it is that you want to go... (more on that)... fifthly... they are like 18 and i'm like 37 and i'm not their friend and i'm not their f*ck*ng mother neither...
--
so... since... uh... forever... there have been social norms on elevator behavior - right? and those norms involve your getting in to the elevator and your turning around to face where it is you want to go.
and i think there have been studies done (even) on how high status people (male bosses etc) will tend to stand at the back so they have their backs agains the wall and can have people in front of them (where they can look at them) but the people up the front... just have to be looked at.
and there were studies done on breaking the social norms. psychology experiments where people would get into the lift and wouldn't turn around to face the doors. would just stare at the people in the lift all in their faces, like. and how... the 'normal' response to that was that the people would start to turn around (away from being stared at).
so in my building there is a lift.
and here is the game changer: there is a mirror on the back of the lift. and so now... you see the kids get into the lift and they are just enthralled by their reflection... there is something magnetic about it. they certainly aren't going to turn away from it (to where they plan on going. and... if they can... they will even migrate to the back of the lift so they can see themselves better. and if you have gotten into the lift first and you are already at the back of it facing the doors (where you want to go) they... don't even seem to notice. that's how enthralled by themselves they are.
like how at the gym you can be standing fairly far back using the mirror and always... someone will get in in front of you (enthralled by themselves not looking out for other people at all) and get in within 30cm of it to... i don't know... squeeze a pimple or check their hair, or something. it's like other people don't exist when they are communing with themselves in the mirror...
it's pretty f*ck*ng weird, i think...
is it just here?
Posted by ed_uk2010 on May 29, 2016, at 15:02:41
In reply to Re: I do miss babble., posted by SLS on March 3, 2016, at 19:24:03
Scott,
Has babble been very quiet lately?
This is the end of the thread.
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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