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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Deneb on July 27, 2008, at 9:56:43
My moods are fickle. This sucks.
I feel kind of numb.
My pdoc will ask me, what happened that led to this feeling?
I dunno.
Could it be the bachelorette party I went to last night?
I really didn't want to go, but somehow they convinced me to go. I didn't go for the whole thing, just dinner. I didn't talk, just ate. Then they went to a club. I slipped out silently.
I just couldn't have fun. There were many people there that I didn't know.
Maybe I've been sleeping too much these few days. Sleeping from 3am to 4 or 5pm. I stay up until morning then sleep until 5pm.
I hope I'm able to work today. I wish I could be dead for a while.
Posted by Phillipa on July 27, 2008, at 11:03:38
In reply to I don't feel happy anymore, posted by Deneb on July 27, 2008, at 9:56:43
Deneb I don't think you can be dead for awhile. Have your meds been adjusted lately? Why do you think you're sad? Did you make work today? Love Phillipa
Posted by TexasChic on July 27, 2008, at 11:20:12
In reply to I don't feel happy anymore, posted by Deneb on July 27, 2008, at 9:56:43
It always pisses me off (at myself) when I don't feel like doing something but people convince me to anyway. And then I just end up feeling miserable. I guess the lesson is don't let anybody convince you to do something you don't want to. Easier said than done, I know
Try to think of how it would feel if you were the one badgering somebody else to go somewhere with you and they are resisting. What would make you leave them alone? For me if someone said firmly, "No thank you, I appreciate the invitation, maybe next time" would be enough.
But for the really persistent people, I think just repeating that same phrase or some variation over and over would eventually get through to them.
"Sorry, maybe next time"
"I appreciate your asking, you guys have fun."
"No, I'm sure, I have some matters to attend to"And don't let them distract you by asking "Why?" A simple, "I just don't feel up to it tonight." should suffice. And if they again say, "But why, are you sick?" Again I would repeat, "I just don't feel up to it tonight." You are under no obligation to give anyone details.
If all this fails and you feel completely cornered, I would say, "Look I just don't want to." We're taught to always be polite and not hurt anybody's feelings, but it that doesn't mean you don't have the right to fight back when necessary.
I guess its obvious I writing all this to myself as well as you. Why is it always easier to give advice than take it yourself? Anyway, try to take it easy. Give yourself some alone, quiet, uninterrupted time to get your emotional equilibrium back. I'm going to go do the same.
-T
Posted by Deneb on July 28, 2008, at 2:09:43
In reply to Re: I don't feel happy anymore » Deneb, posted by TexasChic on July 27, 2008, at 11:20:12
Dr. Bob deleted my new game of Scrabble with him. No reason given, just disappeared.
I'm so sad.
Posted by Deneb on July 28, 2008, at 22:07:53
In reply to Re: I'm sad again, posted by Deneb on July 28, 2008, at 2:09:43
No one is responding. :-(
I cry a bit every time I think about this.
This is a big deal for me.
Maybe no one understands.
Posted by Partlycloudy on July 29, 2008, at 7:23:43
In reply to Re: I'm sad again, posted by Deneb on July 28, 2008, at 22:07:53
Deneb, maybe people aren't sure how to respond. I know that I haven't been feeling well myself and haven't been up to playing games on Facebook. Maybe Dr. Bob is too busy (he sure isn't spending time here on the boards!!).
I'm sorry you're sad. You're not being ignored. People don't always know what to say.
Partlycloudy
Posted by Deneb on July 29, 2008, at 10:55:03
In reply to Re: I'm sad again » Deneb, posted by Partlycloudy on July 29, 2008, at 7:23:43
Thanks for replying Partlycloudy.
I talked to my pdoc about this. She explained that Dr. Bob doesn't want to play favourites and it looks bad if he plays a second game with me. I shouldn't take it personally.
Posted by Phillipa on July 29, 2008, at 19:24:40
In reply to Re: I'm sad again, posted by Deneb on July 28, 2008, at 2:09:43
Deneb seriously heard on the radio today that facebook had some legal problems with the scrabble. Something about copyrights to the game. So that is probably why. Phillipa
Posted by Kath on July 30, 2008, at 11:06:52
In reply to Re: I don't feel happy anymore » Deneb, posted by TexasChic on July 27, 2008, at 11:20:12
I've included what you said & will comment at the end:
> It always pisses me off (at myself) when I don't feel like doing something but people convince me to anyway. And then I just end up feeling miserable. I guess the lesson is don't let anybody convince you to do something you don't want to. Easier said than done, I know
>
> Try to think of how it would feel if you were the one badgering somebody else to go somewhere with you and they are resisting. What would make you leave them alone? For me if someone said firmly, "No thank you, I appreciate the invitation, maybe next time" would be enough.
>
> But for the really persistent people, I think just repeating that same phrase or some variation over and over would eventually get through to them.
> "Sorry, maybe next time"
> "I appreciate your asking, you guys have fun."
> "No, I'm sure, I have some matters to attend to"
>
> And don't let them distract you by asking "Why?" A simple, "I just don't feel up to it tonight." should suffice. And if they again say, "But why, are you sick?" Again I would repeat, "I just don't feel up to it tonight." You are under no obligation to give anyone details.
>
> If all this fails and you feel completely cornered, I would say, "Look I just don't want to." We're taught to always be polite and not hurt anybody's feelings, but it that doesn't mean you don't have the right to fight back when necessary.
>
> I guess its obvious I writing all this to myself as well as you. Why is it always easier to give advice than take it yourself? Anyway, try to take it easy. Give yourself some alone, quiet, uninterrupted time to get your emotional equilibrium back. I'm going to go do the same.
>
> -T**********THAT was great TC. I am 'blown away' by this post. Thanks for the wisdom & clarity.
luv, Kath
Posted by Kath on July 30, 2008, at 11:19:55
In reply to I don't feel happy anymore, posted by Deneb on July 27, 2008, at 9:56:43
Sorry about the game thing. Phillipa's & your T's explanations both sound quite valid.
Deneb, I also agree with what TC said about being pressured into going somewhere that we don't want to - or doing something that we don't want to do. I think her post is worth printing & referring to if this is a problem for you.
I also agree with Partlycloudy. Sometimes people don't know what to say. And also, sometimes people are feeling so shi**y that they just can't say anything.
Deneb, I want to point out something important. I am really impressed with something. I am impressed with you saying that you wish you could be dead for awhile. There was a time when you would not have added 'for awhile'. I think this is huge growth for you. When I talked with my doctor about not wanting to 'be here', he pointed out that I'm going through a LOT and that I want it to end, and that being dead is one way people can perceive of something being over. He said that some patients say they wish they could go to sleep for a long time & wake up & have things be different. When I feel terrible I can have those feelings. When I talked with my husband about it, he asked me if the certain situation I have been so upset by were TOTALLY different, did I think I'd feel that way. It was hard for me to get my head around it, 'cuz part of me doesn't believe the situation will be different. But when I was able to imagine it - no...I wouldn't want to not be here. It's all about NOT WANTING the situation, or the pain.
Anyhow, I see it as a huge success for you to have shifted that statement (& probably shifting your way of thinking about your life).
((((((((((((((((((you))))))))))))))))))))))))))
love, Kath
This is the end of the thread.
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