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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 16 of 16. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Deneb on January 30, 2007, at 21:18:43
I haven't gone to class since my visit to the ER. I don't want to live life. I just want to sleep and dream. Life is too hard. I wish I could escape.
I took a nap and had a dream and it was fun. I woke up and wish I hadn't woken up. I just want to dream all the time.
How do I get out of this rut? I hate this. Is this depression?
Deneb*
Posted by sunnydays on January 30, 2007, at 21:25:12
In reply to I feel sad, posted by Deneb on January 30, 2007, at 21:18:43
> I haven't gone to class since my visit to the ER. I don't want to live life. I just want to sleep and dream. Life is too hard. I wish I could escape.
>**** I know that feeling well. But somehow I usually manage to wake up in the morning and make myself do it. But I know the feeling.
> I took a nap and had a dream and it was fun. I woke up and wish I hadn't woken up. I just want to dream all the time.
**** I don't. Because three quarters of the time my dreams are horrible. But I had a good dream last night, and I wish I could live in that dream. But that's why you have good dreams - to help you clarify what you want in life and to give yourself a reminder of what good feels like.
>
> How do I get out of this rut? I hate this. Is this depression?
>
> Deneb**** Therapy is the best way to get out of a rut like that. It's hard to tell, but it sounds like it may be depression. But therapy is most helpful, at least for me. It's hard to just 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps'. It helps sometimes to have someone cheering you on.
sunnydays
Posted by zazenduckie on January 31, 2007, at 8:51:38
In reply to I feel sad, posted by Deneb on January 30, 2007, at 21:18:43
It might be depression or it might be a defense against anxiety or a kind of self harm (by harming your academic career) with the same motivation as other kinds of self harm.
Whatever it is I am sorry you feel sad and hope you can look for and find at least a few minutes of peace or happiness today. That's what I've been doing looking just for a few seconds even..the kids laughing at the bus stop or the first sip of coffee or anything at all that feels good. And just notice it.
> I haven't gone to class since my visit to the ER. I don't want to live life. I just want to sleep and dream. Life is too hard. I wish I could escape.
>
> I took a nap and had a dream and it was fun. I woke up and wish I hadn't woken up. I just want to dream all the time.
>
> How do I get out of this rut? I hate this. Is this depression?
>
> Deneb*
>
>
Posted by Phillipa on January 31, 2007, at 11:32:36
In reply to Re: I feel sad » Deneb, posted by zazenduckie on January 31, 2007, at 8:51:38
Deneb I need a therapist too. A good one to help me. Love Phillipa
Posted by Deneb on January 31, 2007, at 15:04:17
In reply to Re: I feel sad, posted by sunnydays on January 30, 2007, at 21:25:12
> **** I know that feeling well. But somehow I usually manage to wake up in the morning and make myself do it. But I know the feeling.
Any tips on how to make myself get up in the morning? I can barely get myself up for the afternoon. It's sad, but one thing that helps me up sometimes is Babble. I'm curious about new posts so I get up to read them.
> **** I don't. Because three quarters of the time my dreams are horrible. But I had a good dream last night, and I wish I could live in that dream. But that's why you have good dreams - to help you clarify what you want in life and to give yourself a reminder of what good feels like.
I don't care if my dreams are good or not. Most of them are neutral. I enjoy scary dreams because it's better than my life. I like all dreams except the ones about failing school.
> *** Therapy is the best way to get out of a rut like that. It's hard to tell, but it sounds like it may be depression. But therapy is most helpful, at least for me. It's hard to just 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps'. It helps sometimes to have someone cheering you on.
>
> sunnydaysI'm already doing therapy. It doesn't seem to work sometimes.
I don't want to be an adult. I can't handle it. I don't want to think about my future. I don't want to have responsibility. I want time to stop. I need time to stop. I want to live in a fantasy land. I don't want reality. I want to be 4 years old. I want to go back. I don't want to go forward. I don't want to face life. I want time to stop. Please stop. I don't want to face things.
Deneb*
Posted by Deneb on January 31, 2007, at 15:08:18
In reply to Re: I feel sad » Deneb, posted by zazenduckie on January 31, 2007, at 8:51:38
Thanks ((((((Zazenduckie)))))))
Posted by Declan on January 31, 2007, at 17:18:15
In reply to I feel sad, posted by Deneb on January 30, 2007, at 21:18:43
Life *is* too hard. Of course you want to sleep and dream. And when you wake you wish you hadn't.
I don't think this is a particularly big deal. The solution to it is courage. The Wizard of Oz gave it to the cowardly lion to drink, and it seemed to work, even though he wasn't a real wizard.
Maybe staying in touch with (not neccessarily expressing) your anger is important??
Posted by Deneb on January 31, 2007, at 17:38:05
In reply to Re: I feel sad, posted by Declan on January 31, 2007, at 17:18:15
I need to live life again. I need to take things one step at a time. Tomorrow I must force myself out of bed to go to class. I'll feel so much better if I go to class.
Tomomorrow I will also get my passport photos taken and hand in my application for a passport.
Deneb*
Posted by Declan on January 31, 2007, at 17:48:59
In reply to Re: I feel sad, posted by Deneb on January 31, 2007, at 17:38:05
I have this problem with my accounting and finances. I have to do it, I must do it, and I cannot bear to face it. So, in a tired kind of way, I just tell myself to do at least one small thing today so that tomorrow I won't feel quite as helpless about it.
Posted by gardenergirl on January 31, 2007, at 17:58:41
In reply to I feel sad, posted by Deneb on January 30, 2007, at 21:18:43
Depression sucks.
I'm sorry you're dealing with it too.
Namasté
gg
Posted by dreamboat_annie on January 31, 2007, at 18:59:44
In reply to Re: I feel sad, posted by Deneb on January 31, 2007, at 17:38:05
Baby steps helps. When I have just wanted to curl up and let life pass me by, I have picked one thing each day that will make me feel a bit better. Like, when I was in really bad shape, I made a point of everyday calling a friend to see how they were doing. Every small thing I did - whether it was trying to find a new pdoc or reading a self-help book or researching university courses I would like to take - was a step towards recovery and living life again. How about you force yourself out of bed and just walk to the bus stop and see how you feel. If all is good, then get on the bus and head to campus. All good on that front, hang around for a while and see how it feels. If you feel up to it still, then go to class.
And, I like what Zazenduckie said about noticing the little things that can make us happy. Distracting ourselves from ourselves can be so therapeutic at times. Stupid as it may sound, I always get a smile on my face when I see an older couple (like 70s or so) walking hand in hand and seeming to truly enjoy being with each other. I have a very jaded view of love and relationships, and seeing something like that restores my faith and warms my heart.
Oh yeah, and don't forget the role the dark winter days can play in our moods. Late January and February are particularly hard for me. The long, dark cold winter days in Canada can suck the life right out of me.
Take care, Deneb. You are still young and will find your way. Remember: The Ox is slow, but the earth is patient.
Annie
> I need to live life again. I need to take things one step at a time. Tomorrow I must force myself out of bed to go to class. I'll feel so much better if I go to class.
>
> Tomomorrow I will also get my passport photos taken and hand in my application for a passport.
>
> Deneb*
Posted by Deneb on January 31, 2007, at 21:12:19
In reply to Re: I feel sad » Deneb, posted by dreamboat_annie on January 31, 2007, at 18:59:44
Today was my Dad's day off and he would pick my Mom up from work today. I decided to go with him. I needed to do *something* today, even if it was just siting in the car.
We picked my Mom up. I had a French vanilla hot smoothie from Tim Hortons and my Dad had a coffee while we waited for my Mom to get off work. I picked the smoothie because I didn't want any caffeine to keep me up at night. I thought it was OK, I didn't think it was sweet enough.
Then we went to Costco. I bought some Lipton's noodle soup. My Mom bought me another blanket.
Then we went to Pizza Hut and ordered two medium pizzas.
When we got home a lady called us about my sister's RESP fund. I handled that.
So, all in all, today was better than yesterday. I went outside, bought soup, and handled a phone call.
Tomorrow I hope to wake up at 7:20 am and go to class. Then I hope to go to Walmart and get my passport photos taken. Then I hope to go to the US Embassy and hand in my passport application.
I hope I'll be able to get some studying done tomorrow.
Deneb*
Posted by dreamboat_annie on January 31, 2007, at 21:27:45
In reply to Re: I feel sad, posted by Deneb on January 31, 2007, at 21:12:19
Tim's, Costco and Pizza Hut!! What more could a girl ask for :-) Sounds like you had a good day. I'm glad. And, kudos for handling the questions about your sister's RESP fund. It's the small things that count, really. We don't give ourselves enough credit for all the little things we do that make up our days.
Posted by gardenergirl on January 31, 2007, at 21:45:27
In reply to Re: I feel sad, posted by Deneb on January 31, 2007, at 21:12:19
> Then I hope to go to Walmart and get my passport photos taken. Then I hope to go to the US Embassy and hand in my passport application.
Hey, I have to do that tomorrow, too! I'll wave if I see you there. :)
Namasté
gg
Posted by Deneb on February 1, 2007, at 10:54:49
In reply to Re: I feel sad » Deneb, posted by gardenergirl on January 31, 2007, at 21:45:27
I skipped class again. :-(
I just didn't want to get up from bed.
My Mom noticed and started asking me over and over again if I was OK. Then my Dad did the same thing. Sooooo annoying! I kept saying, "Yes! Yes! I'm fine", and they just kept asking me again and again.
I just wanted them to leave me alone and let me sleep.
What am I supposed to tell them? Was I supposed to tell them I just wanted to sleep my days away? Then what? What will they do for me?
Deneb*
Posted by Jo U.K on February 2, 2007, at 8:45:54
In reply to Re: I feel sad, posted by Deneb on February 1, 2007, at 10:54:49
Aah, so sorry to see you're low Deneb. I think that as parents we just so badly want our children to be well and happy, and as a parent, I feel helpless when my daughter(she's a teen) is unhappy. I know I cant fix everything for her though I so desparately want to, and sometimes it may seem that I go on and on and on with "What's wrong??????? When I get the answer " I'm fine" yet I feel that she may not be and I get frustrated that she cant/wont talk to me. It's hard, and it's a two way thing. You may think they wont understand, and maybe you're right, so perhaps you could keep talking to your T or post those feelings, we can hear you Deneb, we care, and I guess your parents do to. Keep trying.
Best wishes,
Jo
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