![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 32 to 56 of 56. Go back in thread:
Posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 17:31:38
In reply to Re: My Mom is worried about me *trigger* » Deneb, posted by anneke06 on January 24, 2007, at 17:17:54
Thanks for your reply Anneke
I just saw my pdoc yesterday. She made me feel worse. She was disappointed in me. I could tell by her voice and the way she looked at me. She was disappointed. I'm disappointed in myself. I've ruined my life.
thanks for the suggestions. I'm going to try to do nice things for myself. I think I'll go eat something i like and reply to people on the boards.
Posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 18:49:56
In reply to Re: My Mom is worried about me *trigger*, posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 17:31:38
I really want to OD right now. I'm not OK. I'm going to call the Distress Centre.
Posted by ClearSkies on January 24, 2007, at 18:55:07
In reply to Re: I'm not ok, posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 18:49:56
> I really want to OD right now. I'm not OK. I'm going to call the Distress Centre.
Deneb, I'm right here, online. Do you want to call now and tell me what happens? Pretend that I am holding your hand, OK?
ClearSkies
Posted by ClearSkies on January 24, 2007, at 18:56:58
In reply to Re: I'm not ok » Deneb, posted by ClearSkies on January 24, 2007, at 18:55:07
Posted by Kath on January 24, 2007, at 19:20:58
In reply to Re: I'm not ok, posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 18:49:56
Good plan to phone, Deneb - I know that was a while ago.
I hope you're feeling better by now.
luv, Kath
PS - remember you're the caretaker for the various parts of your body hunny. Think of them as your children, maybe - (I dunno, that may be too weird) - but they need you to take care of them...your liver, your kidneys, your bowels, your brain - they're just your poor helpless organs & they need you to take care of them. Putting too much medication into your body is going to hurt them & that ain't fair!!
We folks who care about you want you to feel better & want you to be alive & well, to continue sharing the journey of life with us!
You're in my thoughts, :-) Kath
Posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 22:40:54
In reply to Re: I'm not ok » Deneb, posted by Kath on January 24, 2007, at 19:20:58
I told my parents. The nurse I called told me to go to the ER. My Mom is afraid I will be locked up. She doesn't want me to go to the ER.
My Dad is taking me to the ER now.
Posted by Phillipa on January 24, 2007, at 22:56:50
In reply to Re: I'm not ok, posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 22:40:54
Deneb good luck and you're doing the right thing. Let us know how things are going. Love You Phillipa
Posted by gardenergirl on January 25, 2007, at 0:08:02
In reply to Re: I'm not ok, posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 22:40:54
I'm glad you told your parents.
Thinking of you...
(((((Deneb)))))
namaste
gg
Posted by Larry Hoover on January 25, 2007, at 6:17:21
In reply to Re: I'm not ok, posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 22:40:54
> I told my parents. The nurse I called told me to go to the ER. My Mom is afraid I will be locked up. She doesn't want me to go to the ER.
>
> My Dad is taking me to the ER now.I'm relieved. Whatever follows is a natural consequence of your decisions, Deneb. I hope this spurs you to develop more adaptive coping strategies.
Take care,
Lar
Posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 7:09:40
In reply to Re: I'm not ok » Deneb, posted by Larry Hoover on January 25, 2007, at 6:17:21
I didn't sleep one wink tonight, neither did my parents. My Mom really didn't want me to go to the ER. She was afraid I would be locked up again. She encouraged me to not go to the ER, but I was afraid after I called Telehealth Onntario and the nurse told me to go to the ER. My Mom was crying soooo much. She kept saying she must have done something horrible in a past life and she kept saying they would lock me up forever this time. She said being locked up was a fate worse than death.
My Dad wasn't afraid of me getting locked up. He just wanted to make sure I was OK and was going to take me to the ER regardless of what my Mom said. I must say I'm quite perplexed that my Mom would think being locked up was a fate worse than death. Being locked up is no fun, but it's not a horrible experience.
My Mom told me to lie and say that I accidentally took too much aspirin because I had a headache. She decided to take me to the Civic Hospital instead of the General because I got locked up at the General before and she was hoping the hospitals don't share information. She wanted to make sure I didn't get locked up this time. She told me to lie and say I'd never OD'd before. She was quite adamant that I lie and convince the doctors that I'm perfectly fine. Yes she is that afraid of me being locked up.
I didn't lie when they asked me questions. I told them the complete truth. At the hospital I just got some IV fluids. They took my ASA levels. I was a 2.7 something units. I stayed the night. The took my ASA levels another time. I left at 7 am. I don't think I should have gone to the hospital. I wasn't sick. They didn't give me anything but fluids. I'm sure I would have been OK without them. My ears are still ringing right now, but I must be OK because they let me go.
It was very simple. They just let me go. I didn't need to see a pdoc or anything.
I won't OD again. I don't want to damage myself anymore. My Mom was really really upset.
Deneb*
Posted by NikkiT2 on January 25, 2007, at 7:54:14
In reply to Back from the ER, posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 7:09:40
Funnily enough, I didn't get much sleep last night either.
Please, never EVER behave as you did in babble chat last night.
Nikki
Posted by anneke06 on January 25, 2007, at 8:04:19
In reply to Back from the ER, posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 7:09:40
I'm glad you're OK....but don't underestimate the benefit of receiving IV fluids...it could have saved your body some serious damage. It's not "nothing".
I hope you'll call your own Pdoc today and let her know what happened last night...how you were feeling, what you did, etc. Maybe your meds need to be adjusted to help you feel better.
Hope you have a restful day....
Posted by laima on January 25, 2007, at 9:47:09
In reply to Re: My Mom is worried about me *trigger*, posted by Deneb on January 24, 2007, at 17:31:38
This sounds unexcusable on the part of this pdoc. Does anyone else not think so? And no, life NOT ruined! Hardly.> I just saw my pdoc yesterday. She made me feel worse. She was disappointed in me. I could tell by her voice and the way she looked at me. She was disappointed. I'm disappointed in myself. I've ruined my life.
>
> thanks for the suggestions. I'm going to try to do nice things for myself. I think I'll go eat something i like and reply to people on the boards.
Posted by Dinah on January 25, 2007, at 11:27:01
In reply to Back from the ER, posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 7:09:40
I'm glad you went to the ER and were treated. I'm sure if they gave you fluids, there was a good reason for it.
I'm guessing the hospital knew you already had a pdoc from your intake forms? And you tell her everything from what I understand. So not sending you to a pdoc doesn't mean they didn't take you or the situation seriously.
Your father sounded very sensible, I think. Maybe he'd be a better person to discuss your schooling options with than your mom?
Posted by AuntieMel on January 25, 2007, at 13:40:17
In reply to Back from the ER, posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 7:09:40
Deneb, it is standard procedure to start an iv line when someone goes in. That way they have it already available in case of serious problems.
Posted by Kath on January 25, 2007, at 14:20:03
In reply to Re: fluids, posted by AuntieMel on January 25, 2007, at 13:40:17
Dear Deneb, (((((((((you))))))))))
I'm glad you told your parents & I'm glad your Dad made his own decision to take you to ER.
I'm glad you phoned Telehealth. Last night I was so stressed by the whole situation that I couldn't remember the name: Telehealth.
I'm glad you made the wise decision of telling the complete truth at the hospital.
I'm glad they kept you in & I'm sure the fluids were important.
I agree with everything everyone has already said here.
I am wondering where you got the aspirins from this time.
Obviously your Mom has some concept of what it's like being "locked up" - who knows; maybe something form her life; maybe knowing someone long ago when things were very different. It seems to me that your Dad might be the better parent to talk with about potentially disturbing matters.
Deneb, I hope you talk with your pdoc about self-harm. If she doesn't see it as a major problem, I strongly suggest considering talking with your family doctor about getting a new one. You might also call the Canadian Mental Health Association & see if they have any suggestions. I see this type of self-harm as a very big, potentially lethal problem. I hate to see you in such ongoing distress & unhappiness. You deserve to get help to develop non-destructive ways to deal with situations & feelings. You, like all of us, deserve to be happy & healthy. I wish only the best for you.
Dr. Bob - maybe this should go on Admin - I'm not sure. I just want to say that it was pretty scarey & upsetting not to know how to respond; what to do; how to help etc last night on Chat. Do you have any suggestions? I hope this never ever again happens in the future, but in case it does, do you have any suggestions?
thx Kath
Posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 15:42:00
In reply to Deneb + Dr. Bob, posted by Kath on January 25, 2007, at 14:20:03
This won't happen again, no matter what. I'm never going to OD again. I'm going to use better ways to deal with my problems. I'm really sorry I stressed everyone out in chat. You all care a great deal. I don't want to upset everyone again. I won't OD again. I promise.
Deneb*
Posted by Kath on January 25, 2007, at 16:05:58
In reply to I'm really sorry everyone, posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 15:42:00
> This won't happen again, no matter what. I'm never going to OD again. I'm going to use better ways to deal with my problems. I'm really sorry I stressed everyone out in chat. You all care a great deal. I don't want to upset everyone again. I won't OD again. I promise.
>
> Deneb*Hi Deneb,
I'm glad to hear you say that. And I'm glad that you seem to be looking at how this type of thing can affect other people who care about you.
I think it's important to realize that many of us have either had problems with suicidal thoughts ourselves or maybe with family members. In my case, on Boxing day, I learned that my son had planned to kill himself on Christmas Eve; had a rope ready, in fact. That was pretty darned horrible for me, so to hear somebody talking about ODing is pretty heavy-duty. And I know you didn't think there was a chance of you dying, but as someone pointed out, our body can react differently, different times.
I'm glad you're talking about learning better ways to deal with things.
I feel a bit edgy because you've said before that you weren't going to take pills again, but as it ended up, you did. Obviously calling the Distress Centre didn't solve the problem. I'm not sure if your pdoc is taking this situation seriously enough!!! Hey, Deneb, is there a counselling office at your University? My friend's daughter goes to Fanshawe, in London, Ontario & went to a counsellor there & received support around her depression/meds, etc. I wonder if this is an option for you??? If so, why not make an appointment with a counsellor? They might have some really good, practical help for you. In the past, I have found that Social Workers have a very different way of helping than Psychiatrists, or even than Psychologists. Also, a university counsellor would be VERY 'in touch' with the stresses & issues that students are dealing with.
I'd be interested to hear what you think about that?
hugs, Kath
Posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 16:19:43
In reply to Re: I'm really sorry everyone *****trigger****** » Deneb, posted by Kath on January 25, 2007, at 16:05:58
> Hi Deneb,
>
> I'm glad to hear you say that. And I'm glad that you seem to be looking at how this type of thing can affect other people who care about you.I am. I don't want to hurt the ones who care about me ever again.
>
> I think it's important to realize that many of us have either had problems with suicidal thoughts ourselves or maybe with family members. In my case, on Boxing day, I learned that my son had planned to kill himself on Christmas Eve; had a rope ready, in fact. That was pretty darned horrible for me, so to hear somebody talking about ODing is pretty heavy-duty. And I know you didn't think there was a chance of you dying, but as someone pointed out, our body can react differently, different times.
>
> I'm glad you're talking about learning better ways to deal with things.
>
> I feel a bit edgy because you've said before that you weren't going to take pills again, but as it ended up, you did. Obviously calling the Distress Centre didn't solve the problem. I'm not sure if your pdoc is taking this situation seriously enough!!!I'm scared Kath. I said I wasn't going to OD ever again and I did OD again. I hope this trip to the hospital really set me straight. I can't OD again, ever. I'm afraid of myself. I don't want to die. I dunno why I keep ODing.
>Hey, Deneb, is there a counselling office at your University? My friend's daughter goes to Fanshawe, in London, Ontario & went to a counsellor there & received support around her depression/meds, etc. I wonder if this is an option for you??? If so, why not make an appointment with a counsellor? They might have some really good, practical help for you. In the past, I have found that Social Workers have a very different way of helping than Psychiatrists, or even than Psychologists. Also, a university counsellor would be VERY 'in touch' with the stresses & issues that students are dealing with.
I'm thinking of going to a career counsellor. I need to figure out my life.
>
> I'd be interested to hear what you think about that?
>
> hugs, KathThanks (((((kath)))))
Deneb*
Posted by Kath on January 25, 2007, at 16:58:04
In reply to Re: I'm really sorry everyone *****trigger******, posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 16:19:43
> I'm scared Kath. I said I wasn't going to OD ever again and I did OD again. I hope this trip to the hospital really set me straight. I can't OD again, ever. I'm afraid of myself. I don't want to die. I dunno why I keep ODing.******I'm sure you're scared Deneb. I'd be really scared too. I think it's wonderful that you can be so open about feeling like that! Thanks for trusting me enough to tell me.
Deneb, do you feel comfortable telling your pdoc the very thing that you said above?
Could you ask her if she can help you about it...to help you come up with a concrete plan of how not to do it?
You know, Deneb, if she can't, or if you don't feel confident that she can, then maybe you'd consider getting either different, or additional help. When I was talking about the counselling office, I actually meant counselling about your stress situation/AND your OD situation. I'm sure you're not the only student to have these issues.***I'm thinking of going to a career counsellor. I need to figure out my life.
*****I think that sounds like a GREAT idea!!! I'm going to tell you a story that happened to me. When I was about 14 (and that's a LONGGGG time ago; I turn 60 on Feb 18th!!!) I started to get TERRIBLE headaches. They were awful & I can remember one time in particular, sitting on the chair in the kitchen in such pain - almost pulling my hair out. My poor parents were there & didn't know what to do. So, an appointment was made with a brain specialist (or something like that). He checked me out, examined me, etc. Then he sat down with me & asked, "so Kath, what would you like to do when you finish school? What type of job would you like?" I said that I didn't know. He looked me straight in the eye & very, very kindly said, "There is nothing that I am concerned about with your brain as far as your headaches are concerned. You don't need to worry about that at all! Do you know what I want you to do? I want you to go home & think about what you'd like to do in your life. Think about what kind of job you'd like to do; what line of work you'd like to be in. When you know, I want to hear what you come up with." I don't remember what I decided or any details at all EXCEPT that I never got another headache again. They stopped - just like that!!!!!! I think he was a very wise man. I think he realized that it was intense stress that was causing my headaches & that I needed to sort things out. It still amazes me when I think of that story.
In your case, it wouldn't surprise me if, once you figure things out a bit, you might be released from this anguish that you experience from time to time. I think it is a superb idea to talk with a career counsellor. It might take a bit of time to figure things out. You might need to do some research, etc. Please be really gentle with yourself about it, OK? There's no huge rush. If you feel that there's a rush, you can talk about it here. I think you're going to feel one whole lot better once you get this taken care of Deneb!
I have a suggestion. I'd say that while you're figuring this all out, have it be YOUR thing. I'd suggest NOT talking about it with your parents until you've had a chance to think about how YOU feel; what YOU like; what you WANT to do & what you DON'T want to do. It's a big decision. It might take a good while to figure it out!! I think you need time to mull over different ideas etc without involving your parents. This is YOUR life, Deneb. It's not that you're going to be mean & secretive about it...it's just that I think you need to not have any pressure or stress, etc. that parents can sometimes create.I send you big fat hugs! luv, Kath
Posted by laima on January 25, 2007, at 20:45:32
In reply to Deneb - a little story for you............ » Deneb, posted by Kath on January 25, 2007, at 16:58:04
Deneb! I LOVE Kath's post, above! Loaded with really great and thoughtful advice.
I was wondering something similar like that too- have you had a chance to think over quietly what YOU want for yourself? I mean, forget that your parents, doctor, or anyone else might be "dissapointed" in you over these classes that got messed up. What do you, personally, want? Are you in the right major? The right school? Some schools don't have grades because they don't believe in them, you know- even some really good ones, like Evergreen College in Washington state, USA. Maybe you would like a year off school? Maybe you prefer something like cooking school? Art school? (Can you, for example, imagine a born artist happy in a math-heavy pre-med program?) There are so many options. I'm so glad to read you'll be going to a career counselor! Ultimately, you have to please yourself and the other people have to get used to it. They might say, "But Deneb how can you mess up your life by choosing basket weaving???" And you'll say something like, "Thank you for your concern. But I feel I've made the right choice for myself, I feel very good about it, and I'm trying to succeed. My grades are great these days, and basket weavers are in high demand when you know where to look. I'm a student member of the Basket Weaving Society, and the member's newsletter is full of postings. I've got a great internship coming up which should open some doors in this niche field." (etc.) Once you are on your own chosen track, sure of yourself, comfortable with your direction- I bet you anything that grades, success- it all falls into place as your enthusiasm has a chance to take over.
Posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 21:00:00
In reply to Deneb - a little story for you............ » Deneb, posted by Kath on January 25, 2007, at 16:58:04
Thanks for your advice Kath.
That's probably what I need to do, think about my future and come up with plans.
Deneb*
Posted by Llurpsie_Noodle on January 25, 2007, at 22:22:47
In reply to Re: Deneb - a little story for you............, posted by Deneb on January 25, 2007, at 21:00:00
((((((Deneb)))))))
I'm so worried about you right now. You've had several crises in not many days. In your mom's own mind she's really worried about you too.
You were brave to tell your parents. BOTH parents. Your mom is kind of hung up on "why" but that's a different story. The MOST important thing is to find out for yourself what will change in your life to help you avoid this reaction to crisis.
Even though you may feel better when you see your pdoc next, you should bring her your posts. At the very least, you are having some extreme mood swings. She may be able to prescribble you something to give you some relief. In an ideal world she would give you the tools to help you gain insight into the roots of your behaviors and help you recognize your strength and positive qualities that will give you the power to make changes in your life.
Your dad sounds like he's stable and sensible. Please use his advice when you feel uncertain. Your mother sounds like she's having her own troubles coping right now.
thank you SO much for taking care of you, and doing the right things. Using the phone, telling your parents, telling the doctors, compliance at the hospital.
I hope you find some peace and calm in the coming days. Take it easy on yourself for a while, okay? Maybe a little "mental-health" day is called for. Whatever engagements you have that are stressing you out- cancel them and take care of YOU. School work can wait- ask your pdoc to write a letter. It doesn't make you a bad person to have these thoughts and behaviors. You are still Deneb, and you are still a very special person to me.
hugs and love to you friend,
-Ll
p.s. body butter?
Posted by Dr. Bob on January 26, 2007, at 8:44:35
In reply to Deneb + Dr. Bob, posted by Kath on January 25, 2007, at 14:20:03
> Dr. Bob - maybe this should go on Admin - I'm not sure. I just want to say that it was pretty scarey & upsetting not to know how to respond; what to do; how to help etc last night on Chat. Do you have any suggestions?
It sounds like it got really intense. There's already a thread at Admin:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20070123/msgs/726249.html
Thanks,
Bob
Posted by Deneb on January 27, 2007, at 2:10:44
In reply to Re: Deneb » Deneb, posted by Llurpsie_Noodle on January 25, 2007, at 22:22:47
(((((((((((Llurpsie_Noodle))))))))))))))
Thanks for caring about me. It means a lot to me. I'm going to try really hard to be OK.
Deneb*
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.